Abiding Metamorphosis

Times have changed

2011-05-01T09:36:00.001+08:00

Its funny when I remembered the time, when I was 12, my father told me to learn up the diagram of how an internal combustion engine worked.

Because I was lazy, and more engrossed in playing Diablo II or whichever PC game was hot at the time, I came up with some lame excuse.

“When I get my license, they probably will not use petrol engines anymore, it would be something completely different.” I said.

I got my license when I was 18.

And lo and behold, I was driving a petrol engine. I am now 25, and all the cars Ive driven are either petrol of diesel engines.

Although there are some advancements such as the different variants of cam-timing, profiling, switching, I learnt about the different aspirated engines, H-4s, Inline 6, V6, V8 ,V10, V12, W16 and what not, the key principles are still applied.

Its only until recently when suddenly, going “green” is more hot than Diablo II that we see a new range of engines rolling off the conveyor belts in car factories.

Even so, the hybrid systems still use a petrol engine, where the 4-magic-stokes still apply.

The electric motors are nothing more than an oversized Tamiya engine. So, still not much has changed.

THEN, over breakfast a few days ago, my father said to me, “you need to relearn your mandarin, its going to be the lingua of the 21st century.”

And here I play the conservative one in a argument again.

In my head, “until the day I die, english will still be the top language of the world,”

Its funny how our perceptions change over time. Me, being the radical and forward thinking one when I was 12 said petrol engines would be out of fashion soon.

But now Im fighting to say english will remain dominant.

and my father, doing the opposite.

Except, today, I quite like the petrol engine. The sound it makes is distinctive, the feel, the pull.

And electric engine is, well, just another gimmick, to trick those who believe San Francisco is a country on its own, into spending more money to buy something they already have, that is if they already have an efficient car.

I’ll leave it at that.

Dispute Me

2011-04-09T20:49:00.002+08:00

Man is now here on earth. Where did we come from? Where did the ground where we stand come from? Where did the sky come from?

Religion claimed to have most of the answer. It even tells us where we will go after our physical existence ceases, well.. to exist.

Where the universe came from, mankind has not advanced far enough to say for sure. We have not achieved a level of understanding like how we understand a Pencil works on paper.

That question, I hope will be answered soon.

But when it comes to religion, we have a good idea where it started.
It started when people of old started asking questions like I did in my first paragraph. They associated events occurring around them with stories and tales just to make sense of it all.

Like the coming of Summer, Autumn, Winter and Spring. Read up Hades and Persephone for the GreecoRoman version.

For monotheistic religion, I don't have a specific prejudice against Christianity, but I will use Jesus as an example.

Jesus came about, claimed to want to save the world from sin etc etc. Promises eternal joy in his Kingdom when he returns. Promises those who observe the sabbath to live forever by his side.

It has been a big leap, from pagan society (which was what the denizens of the world were primarily), for someone to lay claim that his father was the ONLY god governing the world we call Earth.

It does not directly provide claim or proof as to how the universe begin, other than "In the beginning..."

Christianity (Catholics and Protestants, I will refer to each specifically if I see the need arise, for now when I say Christianity i mean both) was heavily persecuted in its earlier days. Where masses of people were crucified (it was an old Roman punishment, and its genesis has got nothing to do with Genesis) just because they believed in a new god.

People worshiped in their homes, behind closed doors and windows to avoid being killed.

But again, What a leap! From tree and rock spirits to believing that there is an "invisible man" -George Carlin, living in the sky, watching everything we do.

So many questions unanswered, again to the creation/start of the universe.

Many people of the faith I spoke with, said it was up to "Faith".

"I do not have proof, nor does my religion, to prove the universe was created by my god," a devout Christian said. There were many like him/her, but if we look far enough, it all started with One man.

A man named Jesus Christ.

But by the 1600s, most parts of the "known" world where Christianity sprang about, harbored Christians.

Now. Hear my proposition.

Like the universe, where so much is uncharted, so much is unknown, so many questions unanswered. We delegate these unknowns to a superior being, the mastermind behind it all. And we go with Faith, to know that he/she/it will deliver us from the pain of existence.

Like the universe, the human mind is also very benign. We know nothing about the flesh that allows us to know. We learn so little from the matter which allows us to learn.

From knowledge, to facts, to love, to anger, all of which comes from our brain, but yet again, there is SO little we know of our mind.

Some reports said we only use 1-4% of our brains.

Extrapolate that, and put it against the universe. We know much less than 1% that makes up our universe in which we live in. Its the same thing.

To understand our minds more, which cannot be answered for now, I propose we worship it. Not the brain itself, but the mind.

The mind is capable of so many things, the elements in which we can derive from our mind is endless.

We can move matter, create, destroy, explore and so much more, using the power of our minds, fueled by our muscles to help the mind accomplish what it sets out to do.

So, why not we worship everyone's minds as a "religion"?

Why cant we provide an explanation for the mind like we provide and explanation to the four seasons, to the events that happen around us, and to the creation of the universe?

"But god created our minds, therefore god is still god" Another Christian said.

No. You only wish to have "faith" that god created your minds.
So, who are you to tell me that my "faith" in my mind (and everyone elses) is based on unsound belief? That the mind is not worship-worthy? That we are alone in this godless world?

"Christianity has been around for a long time and billions of people believe in the religion today, billions of people have faith in Jesus and his second coming," he continued.

He added, "It must have been because it is the word of god that his message was allowed to propagate itself among us," he added.

It may have been god's message, but how many times have god sent a different prophet to come and make us download new "versions" of his "mental software"? There was Adam, there was Noah, There was Abraham, Moses, Jesus and even Mohammed, some claimed that they have the latest and last version.

So, which one is the word of god? Can I too, lay claim that I am the new messiah? The latest message, and tell everyone 'oh by the way, god said hi and told us to think more for each other and less for him'.

I will be shot. eventually anyway.

"But all the prophets have done miracles," the Christian said.

What is a miracle? My question was.

"Parting the seas, curing the sick, reviving the dead and coming back to life after getting crucified. There were many witnesses." he elaborated.

The last bit, off topic, but why didnt Jesus just DID'NT die on the cross, and choose to come back to life in a cave when no one can see it happen. No witnesses there right?

My question again is: So miracles are things that ordinary people cannot do.

"Yes" he answered.

Then I want to say, I am thinking. Does that count as a miracle by today's standards?

The devout Christian broke off the conversation, apparently angry because I just indirectly implied he doesn't think.

He said "Anyway, Christianity is a very established religion now, again, Many people have faith."

But it all started with one man. His name was Jesus Christ.

I have faith that the mind is capable of so much, it is on par with the things we call god.

With a god of the mind, there is a religion of the mind.

It will start, like any other religion we know today.

It will start with one man.

That man's name is Roy See.

Headlines

2010-10-20T12:36:00.002+08:00

From NST

"Umno's role as unifier"
something something multiracial outlook, something something unifier for all institutions and something races.

Meanwhile, a French chocolate factory said it will produce Belgian chocolates but will not accept applications from Belgians to be part of the Belgian chocolate production.

Home

2010-10-18T10:57:00.001+08:00

Wisdom, Justice, and Love

2010-09-19T10:46:00.001+08:00

"I come to this magnificent house of worship tonight...

because my conscience leaves me no other choice...

A true revolution of values will lay hand on the world order and say of war,

'This way of settling differences is not just.'

This business of burning human beings with napalm,

of filling our nation's homes with orphans and widows,

of injecting poisonous drugs of hate

into the veins of peoples normally humane,

of sending men home from dark and bloody battlefields physically handicapped and psychologically deranged,

cannot be reconciled with wisdom, justice, and love...

cannot be reconciled with wisdom, justice, and love...

cannot be reconciled with wisdom, justice, and love...

cannot be reconciled with wisdom, justice, and love...

cannot be reconciled with wisdom, justice, and love...

cannot be reconciled with wisdom, justice, and love...

cannot be reconciled with wisdom, justice, and love...

cannot be reconciled with wisdom, justice, and love...

cannot be reconciled with wisdom, justice, and love...

cannot be reconciled with wisdom, justice, and love...

-Martin Luther King Jr.

Sense, It makes none

2010-09-12T10:50:00.001+08:00

"Toilet Paper" and "Football"
-These two things will produce an odd sentence if they are put together in the same one.

"Coffee" and "Socrates"
-Dont think coffee existed when Socrates was around, He drank wine to stimulate his cognitive functions.

"Electricity" and "Justin Beiber"
-His songs are not "electric", no logical meaning can be derived from these two words. Unless you plan on electrocuting that sodder.

"Rain" and "Fire"
-Is not synnonymous, BUT juxtaposes itself with one another. Cold, hot, get it?

"Monkey" and "Banana"
-One is an animal, the other a fruit. But this Animal eats that particular kind of fruit so...

What about...
"Charity" and "Car Maker"?
These two words do not make sense when put in the same sentence. I mean, what has charity got to do with a company that produces cars? I mean, when was the last time you saw these two words put in the same sentence? I bet it has not happened before and It never will!

oh wait, hang on a moment...
"As part of Kia Motor’s commitment to helping underprivileged youth and supporting the growth of soccer at a grass roots level, Kia Motors Corporation headquarters ran a charity campaign on its global corporate Facebook Fan page from early May through to the end of the 2010 FIFA World Cup™ South Africa." (taken from http://www.autoworld.co.za/NewsArticle.aspx?Article=8533)

I dont geddit.

The only logical meaning I can derive from this is, it is part of a marketting/public relations campaign, designed to make people feel good about the car maker Kia.

But we all know the only time we can feel good about Kia cars is when you sell a lemon to an unsuspecting buyer (all Kia are lemon anyway, even the brand new ones). I then take the excess money I got from the sale (paying anything more than a dollar for a Kia is 'excessive' enough) and give it to charity.

Anyway, about the "feel good" element. I mean, Im not part of the, how did Apple put it again? Oh yes thats right, Im not part of the "Kia Community", and I dont subscribe to whatever Kia has to say about "underpriviledged" people or what the CARMAKERS company is going to do to help them.

Shouldnt they leave it to UNESCO or UNICEF or something like that? and focus on what theyre supposed to do? like, err, build better cars?

Back to public relations, me, as a "disinterested third-party" does not "feel good" after reading that. Certainly the next time I buy I car my head wont even be thinking along the lines of "hmmm, that one time Kia donated some footballs to landmine victims, so i think i'll buy a Kia."

Nope, not even close. Far from it even.

The later part of the article reads:
"Through the Kia Charity and Care initiative, the Kia Street Soccer programme is aimed at children from around South Africa who will be given the opportunity to participate in street soccer leagues after completing the accompanying health education programme.
The programme is made up of three phases:
The first being the health and education programme which focuses on three core areas which have been identified by the South African Government as being of vital importance:
Nutrition – what to eat and how to eat healthily, drinking plenty of clean and safe water.
Hygiene – washing hands, keeping your body clean and covering your mouth when you sneeze or cough.
Being Active – how to lead an active lifestyle in order to prevent obesity. "

What? All that, from a CARMAKER? No wonder they build shitty cars. Their products run on "plenty of clean safe water" instead of petrol.

Another one example.

"Honda" and "Golf"

If the carmaker was "Volkswagen" then Id understand, they do have a variant (quite popular too) called the "VW Golf". But Honda? If im not mistaken, "Honda" stands for "Rice" in Japan. "Rice Golf?"

Throw another wildcard word like "Charity" and you have "Honda" "Golf" and "Charity"!

oh wait...
"The theme for this year’s tournament was “Swing on the Charity” which is part of Honda’s efforts to contribute towards helping the urban poor."
taken from (http://www.honda.com.my/newsevents/events/details.dot?inode=62819)

And another,
"PROTON Holdings Berhad (Proton) has established the Proton 25th Anniversary Charity Fund as part of its year-long silver jubilee celebration. Under the programme, it has pledged RM25 from each Proton car sold between April 22 and June 30 to the fund which will be presented to 25 selected charitable organisations during the company’s 25th anniversary commemorative gala dinner."
(http://www.sun2surf.com/article.cfm?id=46044)

As if Proton doesnt already have a notorious reputation for cutting-corners in their car building process. Now they come out into the open and declare "there, we feel bad for nicking RM2500 worth of quality from that brand new proton you just brought from us, dont worry, we well be giving RM25 of that to poor people!"

Another carmaker thats rapidly gaining more and more negative attention is doing non-coherent things!

"Toyota, although suffering a slow down of sales, is still able and willing to keep charity afloat. The company likes to give to charities in the areas where it has plants (5, soon to be 6, in the U.S.), and its donations will amount to $57 million to schools, arts, environmental groups, and other charities this year. "
(http://nonprofit.about.com/b/2008/11/24/giving-declines-from-crumbling-car-makers-but-toyota-is-no-turkey.htm)

Then a fleet of their Priuses will have their gas/electric/Justin Beiber paddles stuck and ram into school buildings, arts museums, environmental groups offices and other charitible associations, which if they had an extra 57million dollars could have made a more reliable car.

The "non-coherent words in a sentence" lists on forever. What I still dont get is, which PR or marketting genius thought of all this in the first place? Maybe he or she is a golf-club-wielding monkey who eats rice and cleans footballs with toilet paper, reads philosophical revelations from coffeebeans while charging an mp3 player thats filled with Justin Beiber songs from a Toyota Prius's battery pack, at the same time singing in the rain while trying to set fire to a carmaker's office which builds bananas for charity.

Change

2010-08-26T12:15:00.003+08:00

Read the newspapers every day. What do you see?

Words like "Kill, died, rape, murdered, kidnapped, riot, protest, poor, rob, steal, death, survive" surface in black ink on rustic paper.

Many years ago, these words were the same, now it still is.

No matter how many individuals band together and champion for "change" for the better, it always fails. There are always "people" in the world who will commit the same mistakes, and inflict the same suffering to others.

On a personal level, I look at myself. Ever since I have achieved sentience I am aware of my actions. I am aware of the actions of others. Always trying to impose change upon myself, I did all I could to make the world around me a better place.

But today, I am still the same man. I am still that bitter person wanting to exact revenge on those who cause suffering. Always wanting to make others realize what they are doing is unproductive and one day might add more of those terms to the paper.

But I fail on every turn.

Change, is an oxymoron. The more you try to change something, the more it is going to stay the same. If there is any change, it is that something getting worse. It is still change right?

"Is it bright where you are
And have the people changed
Does it make you happy you're so strange
And in your darkest hour
My old secrets laid
We can watch the world devoured in its pain"

No, and Yes.

On a higher level, no matter how much faith you can put on someone, that that someone can change, you are lying to yourself, to that person and to the world.

Cheaters who cheat, will always cheat.
People who lie will always lie.
Thieves will always be thieves.
A murderer who "repented" has killed his own instincts. Either way he continues to murder.

US president Barrack Obama, in his campaigns said "Change". People fell in love with the IDEA. Alas, the idea itself did not change. Years after being elected, change, still remained as an IDEA.

He will not win the next election, and the entire nation will relapse back to its stage before his office.

Now take another step back and see the world.

For thousands of years, when this doomed species called man first appeared on the planet. It brought about many "changes". A land that was previously tranquil has its peace destroyed.

The days of Sodom and Gomorrah is one of the world's earliest records (and hint) that the human race is inherently violent bend of self destruction.

But since humans are so resilient, they "change" the world so that they can stay the same. Violence, rape and all that is vice ran rampant on earth.

God came down from heaven and wiped these cities clean with fire and water. Noah was the last of his children, that he deemed pure. and his seeds will blossom into people like-minded and like-behaviored people.

How wrong was he.

Where is the purity of man? Has the forbidden apple cursed out species since its dawn? will this affliction last until the dusk of man?

Most argue yes, before the coming of the end days we humans shall bear the sins of our fathers.

I beg to ask the question: "Then what is the point of the human race?"

Where are we racing to? except our own destruction? The only "change" in this race is the ending where there is nothing but the brilliant stars that forged us and the empty void which holds these stars.

Why would god invent and create a species that he allegedly loves so much just to watch us kill one another?

Why wont he interfere? For millions of years the earth was a violent place. The passing of time "changed" the landscape into a more hospitable one. There was peace.

This is the only fleeting evidence in our earth's history that it was once tranquil. Then god has to come along and shit all over it, and put us humans here.

See the link? Turbulent birth and early life of Earth (violent) --> Turbulent birth of man on earth (violent)

What change? I ask.

If I had the choice to choose which lesser of the two evils Id rather have. Id choose the former, because the only way and the only time the world as we know it can change, is the day before it ends.

Every time some ancient prophecy said the world is going to end, I give them a thumbs up. That is for saluting his/her attempt to have faith that the world can change.

I really look forward to 2012. Where there is quite believable evidence that this time its is for real.

2012, dont be cock teaser. Bring it on, and do us all a favor.

2012, please change us.

War and Unity

2010-08-19T11:33:00.002+08:00

"I killed the hunter that killed the lion."

The answer is a Situation.

Solve this puzzle and i owe you a drink (any drink below rm100).

Destiny, yours

2010-08-02T11:14:00.001+08:00

Unless you cut the strings that bind your limbs,

You will forever be a puppet to the puppetier

Pornography and Rape

2010-08-01T14:59:00.002+08:00

Pornography has long been stigmatised as the leading cause of sexual crimes, yet empirical studies done in Denmark, Sweden, China, West Germany, United States, Japan and some other countries I cant recall at the moment, said otherwise.

There are other possible and plausible reasons as to why the results are "inconclusive" which I shall try to not delve into because its quite complicated (and geopgraphical/culturally sensitive). These things are proper enforcement (specialised units that investigate crimes like these) may lead to a deviation in statistics and results.

But the main issue still stands, making pornography and prostitution available showed a decrease or the "levelling-out" in the regions affected.

Heres my take, but to put things into perspective theres alot of background as to how i have reached my conclusion.

Sex had always been (I usually refrain from superlatives but really,) ALWAYS been a part of, if not THE integral part of the survival of a species.

I am a Darwin-nian, who believes in survival of the fittest and the theory of evolution". According to this belief, only successful species can continue to propagate.

The line of propagation is stipulated by rules of, which is the strongest intra-species shall inherit the right to seed their superior genes into the future.

A healthy lion, who can command an entire pride is allowed to mate with the lionesses he so chooses. A dethroned alpha-lion will have it's cubs killed by the successor, because the genes seeded in the cubs are from an inferior breed. So only the biggest, meanest kitty will survive.

This example, although is not entirely identical to other animal species in this world, is prima facie the underlying pattern for the concept of "survival of the fittest" animal.

I say "animal" because in my book, the species of man is not entirely an animal. I say not "entirely" because we have our roots embedded in primitive-animalian-origins.

To prove a point, we are the masters of this planet because our ancestors "evolved" to be the best. And how we got here, was because our primitive fore-fathers were powerful enough to pimp our fore-mothers.

If a weak-intra-homo-sapien-species had allowed his genes to be carried forward, it would have failed the test of time and we, would not be here today.

Now jump forward 20 million or so years, we are here today.

Any successfull man today, would have no problems "propagating" his genes. And successful man usually (<--see i dont use superlatives) finds a successful female.

Definition of "successful man" in todays context is not "who can kill the biggest mammoth" but who has financial stability (capitalist world), good looking (vanity culture), healthy (always a part of survival) and finally, but not-exhaustive of the category, "has-a-pleasant-personality".

The same goes for "successfull women" (although in modern culture today financial stability is not so much a primary trait, but dont get me wrong, human cultural-pattern is so fucked up it could be anything).

So anyway, where was I, oh yes.

Successful man + successful woman + ??? = profit

Profit meaning survival of our species. We are all so familiar with the saying "dont contaminate the gene pool". damn why didnt i think about this earlier, wouldve made explaining this so much easier.

Now... back on topic, pornography.

Because in society now, with so many criterias to meet, as opposed to killing the biggest mammoth, man has got so much to prove to be the "intra-species alpha". (see definition - successful man)

It is no surprise that some of our fellow species bretheren had failed one or two criterias. He may be loaded, kind hearted and so and forth, but has the face of a baboons back-end, this intra-species example then wouldve failed a major criteria (for the shallow women out there) and would have, in a greater sense, failed as a deserving species to propagate.

thats still a qualified example, for prima-facie cases- its a man who has absolutely failed today's natural-selection criteria. Where there are no desireable attributes.
For example, a man who is forever in debt due to his own mis-strategies, a man who is but ugly, a man who is violent and a chauvenist (spelling cbf), unintelligent and is was born with a limp.

note: why are women so turned off by impotent man? it is their primevial instincts to not carry the genes of an intra-species who cannot propagate. as opposed to "no-action in bed".

anyway, read a few paras up, Why is this man so buttugly? it is because his father or mother, or through some unfortunate accident has left him like this.

Now we look back at the examples i cited earlier. This is where the successor alpha-lion did not kill off the dethroned king's cubs. And had allowed an inferior species to take the next line down. Or, an alpha-male who stepped on a bear-trap, err lion-trap and has been maimed permanently. Either way, if we strictly abide to the lion-rule book, this man-pride's lineage (by nature's law) should have ended.

But because of humanitarian laws etc etc, we cant just put all of our sick dogs to rest. Hence there is a "human" element that is "not natural" that had allowed an inferior species to have a chance to dominate, continuing a flawed attribute.

By natural rule, inferior men, cannot propagate. But they are still bound by the natural sexual urges.

This is where pronography comes in, they can shoot-blanks at the monitor screen, without harming the gene pool. problem solved.

Now, lets take away pornography.

bound by the two laws
1. Natural urge to ensure the survival of species via propagation

which leads to

2. Sexual urges.

The two laws will act full force on a man's instinctual psyche. leading to rape.

Definition of rape: look up dictionary, but basically it means refusal to copitulate (cbf spelling) by one partner, usually the female.

At least with pornography the 2nd criteria can be met. it is proven that once a man ejaculates, the whatever hormones in the body (i think its testosterone) count will reduce. temporarily stifling the 2nd rule, which at least can lead to a reduction of violent sexual crimes.

(note: if the man has good imagination, he can envisualize porn, therefore he can relieve himself with ease without porno, which is good!)

I wrote so much i cant remember the point im tryin to make.

oh yes, prostitution. Prostitution can solve most of the problems above. since man are inherently instinctual and cannot differentiate actual propagation and pseudo propagation.

The act of sex with a woman to them is fulfilling the 1st law. thank technology for contraception where their failed genes (i say failed because if they are 'successful men' they would not need to go to a prostitute) does not "contaminate the gene pool".

It seems i have addressed this issue with a primarily male perspective.

Lets go women for a while.

Prostitutes, i mean the female ones, due to the current capitalist trend where money rules supreme, and also the constant repression of the female-gender, some women either succumb to the pressure and voluntarily become the men's sexual punching bag,

or they go against the repression by trying to prove themselves worthy of the male dominated capitalist realm by earning big bucks. it is noble and worth a kudos for women like that, but some unfortunately fall into the "good idea, stupid execution" model, where they prostitute themselves off to get that extra dough.

Men who go to prostitutes, and prostitutes themselves are failed examples of the human species.

Eitherway contraception is good when practicing pseudo-propagation because BOTH failed man and failed woman dont get their lineage continued.

again id like to highlight the equations discussed

-successful man + successful woman = natural selection = survival of the fittest

-successful man does not need pseudo-propagation; they naturally get to mate

-successful woman does not need to resort to satisfying fail man to be successful
again, succesful woman can get successful man to ensure survival of species (best chances)

-fail man resort to fail woman (prostitute) to satisfy law 1 and 2 but does not contaminate the gene pool with failsauce.

-fail man can resort to pornography to satisfy law 2 to reduce urges for law 1, hence reducing rape and stops gene pool being dipped in fail sauce as well.

-Pornography is an act of pseudo-propagation, where two concenting adults are filmed to satisfy fail man, at the same time earning a buck to fulfil a criteria of being "succcessful". since they are concenting, it is not rape.

In conclusion:

The law of natural selection stipulates, If no one wants to mate with a man or a woman, that is probably because they are failed speciments.

Ramblin Man

2010-07-14T10:50:00.002+08:00

I came back for three reasons.

Family

Friends

Stephanie

which ironically spells "for fucks sake".

The Night Sky

2010-06-30T23:01:00.000+08:00

Seems like such a lonely place at first glance. But let your eyes befriend the darkness, and you shall see glimpses of life, of light.

Oh this familiar feeling...

2010-04-21T13:36:00.000+08:00

This ancient hatred, reawakened.

Rockstar

2010-03-18T10:01:00.000+08:00

You lift me up like the sweetest angel,

You tear me down like a whore.

Are You Coming or Going?

2010-01-29T02:08:00.000+08:00

I step out of the terminal, the cracking sounds of gravel on the tarmac getting less and less as I traverse towards the plane with a heavy foot fall. With both jet engines spooling, hanging low from the vessel’s wings, I look up the stairs that would bring me into the plane. With a heavy heart, I climbed those steps to the very top. Before entering that sliver of tube that would fly me home, I turned my entire body and took a sweeping glance at the landscape.

A green collage of mountains and hills seem to join both the grassy plains and the clear blue sky to form a symphony that is both kind and excruciating. The latter being so because this is probably the last time my eyes would set sight on them. If not forever, at least for a very long time should pass before I grace my vision with scenery as tranquil as this again.

My heart fell, to depths I’ve never imagined possible. The thunderous purr of the jet engines seems to fade into the back of my ears and disappear completely as I reflected upon the past four years. This was the very sight that had greeted me when I first arrived, and this is the very sight that shall see me off. This was the gate to my home for four years, and now I am leaving it with the doors locked, later reluctantly misplacing the keys forever.
Passengers aboard the plane find their seats and stowed their luggage in an orderly manner. Australians, or at least a great majority of them have a high level of proficiency in terms of manners and consideration- another thing that made my mood dip, knowing again this is possibly the last time in a long time that I will be poised by their mere courteous presence.

As the plane taxied along the runway, the attendants stylishly demonstrated to us how to respond in case of an emergency. I usually don’t, but I paid attention this time.
“Cabin crew be seated for take off”, buzzed the first officer into the passenger quarters, and shortly after that, the ship roared into life. I was pushed to the back of my seat, with a familiar feeling in the gut as the plane barrelled down at great speeds down the black strip of ground.

I closed my eyes.

The wheels at the bow of the plane lift off the ground, followed by the ones behind. As it left the ground completely, I felt this agonizing pain throughout my whole body. It was an indescribably feeling, an unfathomable pain. It was like as if,
My soul was rendered in half.

With my eyes closed I could see a shade, on the tarmac, trying his best to run alongside the plane to merge with the other that is sitting on this very seat.

His sprint slowed to a jog and finally to a complete stop. He failed. All he could manage was to look up, both shoulders drooped to the side in exhaustion, and watch the plane take off into the air.

He could wait for the plane to land here again, but he above everyone else will know his other half will not be on it when it does return.

Too Little Too Much

2010-01-28T17:19:00.003+08:00

Loved ones behave like Amplifiers.
They give a little love, you get romance.
They give a little smile, you get happiness.
They give a little attention, you become a star.
They give a little shit...

Dark Star

2009-12-21T13:19:00.002+08:00

Infinite Brightness, but recedes slowly...

Then there is Darkness.

The Lost Regiment

2009-11-04T12:33:00.002+08:00

Close your eyes, it will be over soon.
On a field of white, with streaks of blue,
Cast in ghastly gloom by the placid moon,
The mind races to deliver the soldiers due.

On the ivory shield the azure sword inscribe,
“History this, philosophy that”.
The battle is easily won if we merely describe,
But the miser Prodigy kept his muse, he refused to let.

On the field of white, the army assembled.
Discarding board for sword-
Defence is futile now they’re enfeebled.
Surviving alone won’t win the elegant horde.

The clanking of steel roams the air,
As the soldiers charge down the despot’s land.
Thunder raged in the night sky that’s fair
The soldiers become more confused with each stroke of their master's hand.

Close your eyes, it will be over soon.
On a field of white, with streaks of blue.
The bewildered soldiers now marooned
By their incompetent master, they’re left astray
To wander in yonder, in the field of white with streaks of blue, without a clue.

Context

2009-10-16T22:07:00.001+08:00

Intellect is a gift when you use it to lead yourself and other men to greatness

Intellect is a curse when no one else around you has a fucking clue

Systems

2009-10-12T21:42:00.002+08:00

"Would you try and reason with a Cockroach?" Answer is probably no, because you know the cockroach does not have the ability to understand you even if you tried your best. But is your "best", the "best" of the human race?

what seperates human beings from the rest of the animal kingdom is our ability to serve our cognitive functions. Actually, the fact that we have cognitive abilities alone justifies us as the master species of the planet. But even our own brains are in a sense, limited to certain levels of efficiency, limited by other factors and systems, such as the human body.

It is important in every mechanism, in every system where two or more structures co-exist, one to dictate and the other to follow that dicatation to be in-lieu with one another. To be synnonymous with one another. Imagine two cogs of different sizes, spin them hard enough and its almost a given they will either derail or break.

It is paramount when two structures that coexist to serve one another be connected with one another.

However, its alot easier said than done. Its alot harder even, to think of one and then DO the same.

These coexisting strutures, well exist everywhere. The most common, and also the most problematic is the relationship between the mind and the body. It is a well known fact that the mind dictates the body. Sometimes the status quo is reversed, rendering the mind helpless to bodily ailments. But that is just us humans reversing down the evolutional chain to more primitive manifestations of life which is innate, since we humans have not achieved a level where our minds reign dominant over all other entities. I would argue, that it is most problematic when the mind functions too quickly for the body to follow.

Say for example, when youre thinking, and you need to put those cognitive points down in a readable, physical form, such as text. The mind races forward, leaping through every detail, every piece of information, and as how thoughts behave- like connected cars in a train, disrupt just one of them and the whole system collapses.

It is not uncommon for thought "cars" to be distracted. And the biggest distraction to the mind, ironically is the body.

As aforementioned the mind steam-rolls ahead. Barreling down the tracks, or road, or any path way you so desire to envisualize the progress of rational thought, because of the speed of which the mind operates, the body can never keep up with the mind's pace. Hence causing that very distraction that unravels the system.

From here two things can happen. The first is that the whole system breaks and shutsdown, disabling the mind completely as the body fails completely to follow suit. The other is more compensative, where the mind slows down to a pace at which the body can accept. Typing this blog post for example, the mind is already past the ending, and thinking of the next issue to tackle and how. And by the time the processes involved in typing this post is complete, the mind if set free- has already completed the next task at hand.

So, because the body has to keep up, I shall end this post. But before doing that, I shall re-highlight the last words of Socrates. I say last words because it was definately not his last thoughts.

Socrates was a philosopher who lived in pre-biblical times. Often prodding other people to think about issues which he saw before anyone else, which when solved, effectively breaks down government. Because the latter wishes to keep in power, to enslave the minds of the many, they framed Socrates as a dissenter, and have him punished "rightly" so - by executing him.

"Forcing" Socrates to ingest poison to take his own life (note the inverted quotation marks). Socrates willingly take the punishment, not because he was sick of how stupid people around him were and that they had no hope, nor worthy of being graced by his advanced system of thought - he saw his body as the biggest hindrance to his truth-seeking quest. His body, like any of ours, is limited by speed, by sustenence, pleasures and rest. By eliminating the body, he claims, actually sets the mind free.

There is one problem though, earlier I mentioned two systems are required in order to make work materialize and function. The mind and body are two distinct, yet arguably inseperatable entities, that co-exist as a system.

Wouldnt eliminating a cog from a system of gears make the other cog spin without effect? If only Socrates can again grace us with his discoveries about life from death, and illuminate us all from this inefficient duality of a system we live under.

But yet again, why would Socrates reason with us when we do not reason with cockroaches?

Malignant Narcissism and Absolute Power

2009-09-26T20:21:00.002+08:00

But' tis a common proof,
That lowliness is young ambition's ladder,
Whereto the climber-upward turns his face:
But when he once attains the upmost round,
He then unto the ladder turns his back,
Looks in the clouds, scorning the base degrees.
By which he did ascend.

Act II, Sc. i, II, 21-27

Words of a Dead Man

2009-09-23T07:39:00.001+08:00

"And I forget just why I taste
Oh yeah, I guess it makes me smile
I found it hard, it's hard to find
Oh well, whatever, nevermind."

-Cobain

The Bigger Picture

2009-09-21T19:57:00.002+08:00

Like the stars and moons in the sky, they float close to one another...

...then drift away into the darkness.

The Smiling Dog

2009-08-28T09:39:00.003+08:00

It was night time. I sat in my living room, watching the television. But i could not focus nor understand the person in the box is trying to tell me. My mind was elsewhere, somewhere far from home. Hoping that my “mind” would return soon, or i would definitely lose it.

Just as i had that thought, the heavy electric gates jolted into motion, making a loud clang as it always did when someone opens it using the remote. I immediately jumped out of the sofa, and unlocked that large silver padlock to go out. Mz, my eldest sister was carrying a paper box, with a smile so wide and curved the crescent moon should be envious of.

She was trying to navigate the dark and narrow corner caused by my mother’s car that had been parked before my fathers, but she seemed to have done it with ease, both of us had the same thing in mind, to quickly get to our backyard and unleash the contents of that box she was carrying. Mq, my 2nd eldest sister too was hyper with joy.

No one said a thing, the buzz in the family could not be described in words.
Crossing the living room, to the dining room to the kitchen seemed an eternity, but alas we were all squatting down on the kitchen floor, and my sisters slowly, gently unfolded the box lid. Inside, was a snow white, furry ball. Inanimate at first, it slowly turned around, revealing its eyes. Like two black marbles embedded in the slow, its innocent stare melted five hearts mercilessly.

It was a puppy, a Japanese spitz.

It was also afraid, afraid of the new world it was in now. Afraid that we are all monsters hungry for a feast, which at the time really seemed like what it was. We wanted to stay with it for the whole night, as it was so adorable, more innocent than us mere children of 15 years below, i myself was only 9 or so.
Then Mq asked, “where is she sleeping tonight?”, “inside the house!” i yelled. “don’t be ridiculous,” mother said, “just leave it outside for tonight, it will get used to it sooner or later, and you three should really go to bed, its 10pm already”.

All three of us, after putting her down back in the box, now laden with old rags and towels, and the after the box was set in a corner of the wetkitchen outside, we shuffled our heavy feet back upstairs to our rooms.
That night i tossed and turned endlessly, hoping for daylight to come. That night was akin to suffering in hell, hoping the day would tick past what was an eternity and i would be redeemed again.

Too tired from the excitement, i did fell asleep.

I opened my eyes, and the leaves of our curry tree periodically obscuring the morning sun on my face, i jumped up out of bed. Did not even bother to brush my teeth, and ran straight down to the kitchen.

There she was, standing just outside the door, with her miniscule tail swaggering like a noob pirate trying to wield a wooden sword, her tongue sticking out. I went closer to her quickly, just before reaching down to pat her, with her head held high, she spun herself a full circle before starting up at me again, the structure of her jaw makes it look like she is smiling, but we had a feeling if she could smile, she indeed was doing it.

Little did we know that became her signature move in the years to come.

It was a weekday, and i had to go to school. Never had i hated school that much. From last nights hell on bed to limbo in the classroom, i jittered, i shuffled my feet, i shook my tight, i spun my pen and bit by fingers. Then the school bell rung, after a total of 12, i would be free.

Like the man in the tv the night before, i could not understand what my teacher was trying to say. My mind was covered in a blanket of white furriness. Spinning my white eraser round and round, like how she would do it, i smiled to myself.

I stuck my head out of the bus while going home. The wind on my face was sweet freedom. My friends kept asking me about my new puppy and i told them with much enthusiasm.

Reaching home, i left my school bag outside, and just played with her until the sun set that day. My sisters were there too. We struggled hard to think for a name for her. None of us came up with a good one, and we jsut let it hang.

The sky grew darker and darker, but her white fur penetrated the darkness and was the only que to where she was while i sat in our backyard still playing with her all types of games. That day she barked for the first time when i sat up on a highwall. She again looking at me with her swaggering tail and wide eyes with tongue out.

It was then my sister Mq came running out, and yelled “Sabrina!”. “what?”
“call her Sabrina!”, she was only inside watching the television while having her dinner and Sabrina the Teenage Witch cartoon was on. It was a good name, i agreed and Mz did too.

From henceforth, our first puppy, our first dog came to known as Sabrina.

-------------------------------------------------------
I remembered the days, where on Saturday lazy mornings, i would lie down on the dining room floor, and you would curl up at my feet.

I remembered how mom’s friends would say you are a dog who can smile.

I remembered watching you grow day by day, from a little fuzzy ball to a respectable, elegant size.

I remembered watching your wooden sword tail grow and spread like a peacocks feather.

I remembered carrying you home after you attempted to run out of the house and you turned around to lick my nose

I remembered the time you would be our goal keeper, intercepting our goal shots, and would always let go of the ball once i place my feet on it, as if you were saying “again! Again!”.

I remembered watching the stars on the drive way with you, troubled by human things, you reminded me theres a simpler way of life by tossing my arm over your back with your black buttoned nose.

I remembered you galloping at me with so much excitement you forgot how to run with
four legs as i lie down on the floor.

I remembered you always love to curl your back against my feet when i sat cross legged on the floor.

I remembered how i shoved you under the piano and you would panic and crawl out, but always came back to me for another go.

I remembered bathing you with cold water, and you would shiver and all i did was wanted to hug you warm again.

I remembered that same bath that you shook off all the soap water on my school uniform

I remembered how you always try to catch stray cats but they are always too fast for you

I remembered when i slept on the living room sofa at night, you would wake me up by either sleeping under my arm, or licking my finger tips, then look at me with those wide eyes and wagging tail as if its perfectly okay to wake me up.

I remembered you would always bark at nothing past the gate, it really annoyed us but we know youre just doing your job.

I remembered how you would join us for dinner, and i would feed you a bone by biting the edges of it with my mouth and you would receive it at the same time trying your best not to touch my lips at all.

I remembered you would always bring the food we give to you outside because you wont dirty the floor. After youre finished you would run back again looking for more.

I remembered when you would stare out into nothingness and make us wonder what is it you see that we don’t.

I remembered that time you were hit by a car and lost one of your canines, the vet sedated you and you had the full length of your tongue sticking out. Getting home after that you would sit on the mat and rested where we were, still with that smiling face, as if telling us "im okay!"

I remembered every time after a years away from home, you would approach me with suspicion, sniff my shins for awhile and immediately spin around in a circle and bark.

I remembered when i watch television at home, i would hear the clicking of your nails on the marble floor as you attempt to stealthily sneak next to me.

I remembered hiding in the curtains to watch you look for me after i call out your name.

Most of all, i remembered that first day i met you, that set of eyes that melts our faces, that swaggering tail that makes us smile, and that squeaky bark that makes us laugh.

We will always remember you Sabrina, as our first puppy, as our first dog. I will always remember that night i couldn’t sleep because i wanted to see you so bad.

Tonight, will be the same, but knowing now matter how bad i want to see you, no matter how soon the dawn will come, i know you wont be there in our kitchen anymore, you wont be there with your wide eyes, with your wagging tail, and that smiling face anymore.
Where you will be- you will be in our hearts.
Rest Well, Sabrina, Rest well, old friend.

Wrath of Nature

2009-08-27T10:38:00.001+08:00

I am the warm winds of spring; who blows your way because it is my nature.
I am the said season’s sun, who lights your way in fulfilling my function.
I am the night of the summer, who lifts the dreaded heat.
I am that smooth rock by the river, which becomes your convenient seat.
I am that burning coal, which you survive on while I burn into oblivion.
I am Father Time, which erases distant memories to make way for your future.

I do not exist for the sole purpose of your relief and bliss. I serve my own purposes, as things would have it, you reap the benefits of my existence and I allow you so.

If you were to use idle words to describe my being, to maliciously twist the profits that I willingly provide, then may it be so that

You shall wither a in the warm season’s cold.
You shall grope with danger in the shadow.
You shall burn in the full force of my alter ego’s wrath.
You shall stand as punishment in the flowing river’s path.
You shall die a cold death because the fires burn hollow.
You shall wander lost and confused in eternity’s fold.

Schema Dilemma

2009-08-20T21:37:00.002+08:00

When the Sky Splits and the Earth Divides;
Which soil should your feet Confide?
When the Sea Tears and the Paths Diverge;
At Which End should your Mind Emerge?

If Living is akin to Fatal Suffering,
And Death a solution if one is Willing,
Then should one endure accusations that keep him in culpable?
Or should one be named The Coward when he hastens the Inevitable?

We are all given the false pretense of man-made fate; the illusion of choice.
Our alleged own words are mere silhouettes; pronounced, made known to the rest, by a borrowed voice.

What are the Odds of That happening?

2009-08-20T10:02:00.001+08:00

“A Happy Man Rants not, lest the Man is Unhappy and Suffers in Silence”

Anyway, just a quick snippet of something freaky that has happened the past week.
Weather was good, so I summoned up a group of friends to go fishing by the cape in Taroona. Being my 2nd time fishing with the first catching nothing but a dumb crab, I was enthusiastic in hauling up some fishes that day.

I straightened the rod, set the bait and cast the line. Within seconds, the tip of the rod starts nodding down erratically, I knew I had caught something. Mirroring what I saw on TV and also pointers from my friends who are obviously more experienced than I in fishing, I reeled my catch in with much force and grace.

To my great surprise, I did indeed catch a fish. It was a coastal breed of catfish, and it was quite large and the rod can barely support the weight of the fish once it was out of the water.

What was interesting about this catch was, towards the end of the tail, there was another hook in addition to the one in its mouth which I caught it from. So this fish has been “hooked” twice, how the 2nd hook got into the tail, I have no idea and thought it was physically impossible.

Anyway, I tried to remove the hook from the fish, using a tool Allan had provided. Being a total noob I really didn’t know how to. And the result was one fish squirming in a bucket half full of sea water, painfully so. I felt bad, but the adrenaline of standing on a precarious, slippery rock, and the wrestling that ensued the reeling of the fish left me with a great high.

This is the 1st time ive caught something with a fishing rod. I remembered more than a decade ago, my cousin and I would make fishing rods out of bend wires, some thread and a long stick, in the hopes of catching something off the river behind my grandmothers house, to no avail of course. This was a “dream come true”. It was something I had always wanted to do.

Resting for a moment, trying not to think too much about the painful process of removing the mangled hook out from the fishes mouth, I marvelled at the size and the sheer fact I had caught a fish. 1st one amongst 5 other friends to do so too!

I set a 2nd bait, cast the line and left the rod on one of the many rock crevices. Before I even got to sit down, again the line nodded. And before I knew it, I again gracefully reeled in a 2nd catch.

This one even bigger than the 1st had a bloated tummy, and it really looked like it was pregnant. I didn’t want to go through the trauma of removing another fish hook, so I had allan do it.

The interval between my 2nd and 3rd catch, Sani and Dennis both caught something. Sani caught a flounder and another catfish. Dennis caught this odd looking fish with protruding jaws. It looked like a deepsea creature. Not knowing what it was, we were happy he caught anything at all. Allan and Melvin did not catch anything.

After my 3rd catch, the sun was setting and we were losing light. So we started our march back to our cars at the carpark.

Walking along the beach, treading on the soft sands, I could not help but think about the processes of fishing. Sure the excitement of feeling your rod fighting back as you try to reel your catch in was a great experience.

But on one side of the rod, is a man flattering his own ego; on the other side of the rod is a creature ensnared in suffering.

We planned to cook the fish for dinner, and I told them “lets say a prayer before we send the knife down”.

Driving along the ultra-bendy roads home, my mind kept flashing back to the process involved in removing the fish. Some may argue im not an expert hence ive induced more pain on the fish, but, a hook larger than your face pierces through your mouth is undeniably painful.

Then all of a sudden, the brakes on my car fails. The battery indicator flashes on my cluster, giving the car more gas does nothing, infact doing the latter makes the car sputter. My car has stalled going 60kmph on a bendy coastal road.

Not panicking, knowing the road a little, I slowly used my handbrakes and did minor steering adjustments to compensate for the fact I have lost power and brakes to my car. And eventually stopped at a turn-off.

My friends later arrived, we tried everything, jumpstarting, push starting the car to no avail. The engine cranks fine as it lunges forward if I start the car in 1st gear. My lights work, so does my radio, which means the battery is not dead.

I called RACT and they said since im not a member, I would need to pay over 300dollars for them to send someone over. I hung up after I told the operator I would consider that as a last resort.
a
Then we thought about the fish, and Sani said “maybe we angered some spirits”. Allan was usually a pro, and catches the most and the largest amongst everyone. That day he didn’t catch anything, me being a complete nubhead caught 3 out of the 6.

Not feeling very optimistic, Sani called Allan to release the fishes.

Right after he hung up, a man came over and said “I know whaats wrong with your car.” Said something about a fuel distributor not giving out fuel, but he cant find the parts since it’s a “European” car. He then called RACT, and used his membership. A few moments later a van with all the parts came along, swapped out a fuse and turned the ignition key.

To everyone’s surprise and delight, my car roared into life. Fiercely idiling at 800rpm. That put a smile on everyone’s faces, especially mine.

The sheer coincidence of my car breaking down after catching so many fishes, and right after that phone call was made to release the fishes did the good Samaritan came by.

What are the odds really.

For the Troubled Travellers

2009-07-25T01:19:00.000+08:00

Suffer no more in your solemn soliloquy.
For no one entity is alone an entity.
If you shall find your mind in a state of delirium,
Let the rhythm of your beating heart be your equilibrium.

Should you come face to face against failure?
Make for certain its lessons turn to tenure.
Should you want to forfeit in exasperation,
Weave that fury into burning determination.

Cry in regret if its appeasement it brings,
But dry your tears before the spring birds sing.

Stride with pride and dignity,
Tread with strength and buoyancy,
The path laid before is arduous and long,
But announce the epilogue with a triumphant song!

How Many

2009-07-20T20:57:00.002+08:00

Hints, does a person have to give to the other, in order to make that other person KNOW, or at least FEEL that he or she is NOT WELCOME? How many more? are needed before that despised person can at least have a sense or an inklink that some personality changes are required in order to be welcomed once more?

Recently, it seems that a whole day of non communication, and half a day more of phone silence, ignored phone calls, ignored msn msgs and physical exclusion is NOT ENOUGH to send the message across?

Maybe I should tell him in the face. But that makes ME the evil person right?

Holla!

2009-07-16T07:41:00.002+08:00

Back from Melbourne, classes resumed. Once again - Purpose! Instead of just stoning around, trying to look as much as i can being an inanimate Rock. Melbourne was great fun! Hop over to www.minicoops.blogspot.com for pictures! (because im lazy to upload the same set of photos here)

aaanyway, this being the last semester before i get that piece of paper that makes me eligible to print money, i really really want it to be as smooth as possible. However, at the same time i know this is perhaps the last chance i get at honing my "working skillz" so i want to challenge myself by stepping out of my academic comfort zone.

Which means enrolling into subjects that are not "comfortable", as in "hard". But theres a twist to that... Like aforementioned, this is my last semester, failing any subjects now = faildegree = wtf.

Anyhoo, i did infact enroll into some hardsauce subjects. one of them is Convergent Journalism, which is really what all journalism, especially in the news reporting business is about.

News of ages past means a bloc of text in some textual medium, ie. newspapers. With the advent of sub-recent technology, we now have television, radio and internet news (by all means not exhaustive). So, Convergent Journalism is really the "converging" of all these news mediums into one.

Present day news, almost all of them now feature videos, or some sort of electronic, technology assisted material. This subject aims at training students like myself to utilize all these different tools when presenting a news story. like, 1st writing an article (perhaps one of the most archaic form of news media), then flowering it up with videos. These videos can be interviews, featurettes or presentations. Other forms of technology medium can also be used, such as radio, or as already said above- the intohnut.

I mean, all these things are pretty easy to work with id imagine. The hardest part is, in my opinion, the news story itself.

Ask yourself this, whenever you read a paper in the morning, or at any time of day really, how often do you ask yourself when reading any given article this question :-

"Is this news worthy?"

Sure you want to know about the earthquake that hit New Zealand yesterday, or when Michael Jackson passed away, but do you really want to know how many calories are there in your caesar salad? or maybe some vehicular accident that took place several states away from where youre staying , or would possibly go? Or maybe that rapist who finally got convicted of his/her crimes after 10 years of crown litigation?

That is the question.

Death

2009-06-22T11:23:00.001+08:00

I had this random thought born out of idleness.

"My Death will be swift". Not dying in my sleep, but dropping dead just like that.

No im not depressed, just...

Many Similes

2009-06-17T13:23:00.002+08:00

Its like, a man without eyelids, staring into the the burning light of a thousand suns. The skin chars and the lung scorches with heat of hellfire, but worse the light that illuminates blinds the very beholder.

Its like, biting down a loaf of meat, bred full of maggots, which squirm into your every orifice. some makes way into your mind, and relentlessly chew on your already rotting brain, leaving nothing but their excrement, and that which becomes your world.

Its like, running on brimstone, where your feet is overcome with fatigue and tire, so much you long to sit and rest, but if you do, it is your bosoms that needlessly endure the punishment. The only relief then, is to keep running as hell is indeed, clapping at your heels.

Its like, bathing in blood, where the stains on your body is purified by the lives, sins and tears of others.

Its like, your lips become your ears, where every note, sound or scream you make is channeled straight into your mind, ricocheting, bouncing, resonating and reverberating in your skull that is the drum for all eternity.

Its like you wail in pain to silence those voices, but all it does is amplify the sound, trapped, circling your thoughts for all eternity.

Its like, drinking water that is desert sand, you thirst for relief and take gulps and gulps in hopes to vanquish the scorching sensation, yet despite all the effort your throat burns with the intensity of the same thousand suns. Drowning in your own burning misery, the only comfort is to suffer the ravaging thirst.

Its like, spitting against the wind.

Its like, watching your brother bleed out his life in all haplessness, when it was you who drove that dagger in his heart.

Its like, cursing the bright full moon for all its eeriness when it is the sun who provides its mortifying glow.

Its like, likening your mirror image with something you have never seen the likes of before.

Emptiness in Enrichment

2009-06-13T19:40:00.001+08:00

Herein lays a man, without company, without friends.
His sorrow heard but not attended, his regret felt by some, but not amended.
Unsolicited words and voices inaugurated themselves, unremittingly in his resenting conscience.
Uninvited rites of passage imposed on his weary body, which holds his future in suspense.
Will he bear these wounds wrecked upon him in absolute silence?
Or should this man wail or cry with heaven-trembling violence?
Herein lays a soul, full of sin, full of woe.
Surrounded by others lost, not found, and many more whose allegiance among friend or foe-
Is not yet known.
Would one sing a song for it to finally repose it of its existence?
Or should you continue to be impartial, disinterestedly sit on that fence,
To watch in glee this wandering essence, persist in its itinerant journey to lands unmapped?
Or would you light a fire to aid the wanderer guide its own path?
Or would you deprive what was granted to you in Prometheus’ aftermath,
To know this drifting soul gropes with perils in the dark.

Enrichment in Emptiness

2009-05-26T21:31:00.001+08:00

"An Empty Jar of Coffee Powder is a Mind Full of Energy and Ideas"

The Price of Happiness

2009-05-19T10:00:00.000+08:00

Lately I have been having some horrible nightmares. Having nightmares is nothing new to me as I indeed have some fucked up dreams. But it occurring 6 nights a week, it can get quite disturbing. So I set my mind out to figure out what is causing all these night terrors.
But before that, we need to review what the dreams actually meant, what are the external stimuluses that becomes the manifestation of these dreams? So to do that, I need to get back to what I was dreaming...

Vaguely recalling some, vividly recorded others, here are a list of those dreams which i remembered. Ie: made the deepest impressions.

Dream 1: Steven having a near death experience.
The dream started out in a dark city, where it was nigh time. Tall gothic buildings set the skyline. Long wet/damp dirty alleys become the ground on which i was standing in.
Then all of a sudden, Steven appeared. Not healthily, but on the floor. The atmosphere became immediately tense, not that it wasn’t tense before, but seeing him hapless on the floor, with a noticeable amount of pain aggravated the atmosphere.
He was on the floor, with alot of pain to the point he was unable to move, almost like a corpse. In my mind, he was enduing so much suffering he was ready to roll over and die.
I ran to him, and thought he must still be alive, so I took his pulse – extremely weak and irregular. He was indeed still alive, i took a flashlight and shone it into his eyes. His pupils contracted, still has brain function. But the latter part made me irk-
As i pulled his eye lids apart, there were flies inside. And the supposedly “white” part of his eyes were stained yellow, almost like a rotting fish.
I don’t know why, but i knew it was poisoning, and that the venom was eating his stomach out from the inside. I took a scalpel, and made an incision in the middle of his chest, the part where the rib bones connect, just above the belly, i stuck my hand inside his guts, and felt the elongated organ. It was his stomach.
It felt really stiff, as if it was filled to the brink with small pebbles. Like a wet sandbag. Using that same scalpel, i cut the tubes connected to it, the top part where it connects with the oesophagus and the bottom pipe that connects with the small intestines.
I pulled it up, and cut it open. Inside it was filled with green, moss-like stuff. It was dry, and had the texture of dried seaweed, after probing it forawhile, it threw it away and concentrated on Steven. He was still alive, somewhat relieved that what has been ailing him had been removed, but he was in even greater pain than before.
He was dying.
The ambulance came soon after, and brought him to the hospital.
Next scene was i was in the ward with him. He was lying on the bed, wearing a hospital gown. Here was a scar on the spot where i had made that incision.
He got up, recognized me, but couldn’t pin my name. Then he kept walking around the room quietly, confused. I tried to set him down to sleep, but he couldn’t, and wouldn’t listen to me, almost as if i was invisible.
The dream abruptly ended.
Interpretation:
usually when someone dreams about someone dying, it signifies “rebirth”, meaning their stepping into a new phase of their lives. But i have no idea what “near death” translates into. The fact that i was the impromptu surgeon that had “saved” him, the amnesia on his part totally eludes me. This is the first time ive dreamt of a friend, who didn’t recognize me.
The surgery was significant also, what is ailing Steven to the point where he almost died? What has been causing him so much suffering and pain? And how did i know it was his guts that were poisoned? And why did i think it was poison in the first place?
Poison usually signifies a slow and painful death, its not sudden, and has the “inevitability” element. Even after i have removed the source of the poisoning, he was still in alot of confusion.
Maybe: Steven is going through some odd times in his life, and that it required a friend (not implying that its me) to “save” him. But one draw back is that, whoever that does the saving, will be alienated.
Kinda like that song by Third Eye Blind. “Wish you would step back from the ledge my friend, you could, cut ties with all the lies that youve been living in, and if you do not want to see me again, i would understand.”
Hope all is good Steven.

Dream 2: Falling from the plane
This one was an odd one as well. Even though dreams of falling and flying are the most common dreams ive have, this one actually had a goal for me, not just flying around for fun.
I was on a plane, it felt like a military plane with no seats like a commercial plane would have. The side doors were open, and i could see the clouds that are beneath me. It spanned far and wide, but were not thick.
My “master” was next to me, how i knew he was my master i had no idea.
He tossed something that looked like a pen out the door, and it fell into the clouds, and told me to “get it”.
I asked “you will come and get me right?”
Master was silent. But i jumped anyway. After falling from the plane i immediately looked back at the plane, and saw the clouds pull away from me at biblical speeds as i fell from the sky. I turned back and saw the falling object. I dived towards it, and grabbed it with my both hands. Then realized i was going to die, unless i could fly.
Holding onto that object, i closed my eyes and concentrated really hard (this is an innate event in all my flying dreams, im always holding to some form of artefact and if i focused my energies to it, i could fly, these objects could vary, just to name a few, a zippo lighter, a round sphere the size of a tennis ball etc).
So, as i fell, i concentrated really hard. And at the back of my head i was hoping my master would swoop down, and save me from my splattering death.
The dream ended, right before i was a spec of red paint on the fields of green grass which was the floor below.

Interpretation:
Well, to be honest, i have NO IDEA what this dream is about lol.

Dream 3:
This one is disturbing. And it only happened last night. I dreamt that a relative or friend of mine, had a wife. And this wife is what stands between my partner and I. Something like, she (yes it was a girl) was the one who holds the final word if my partner and i were to be together.

I respected this girl, but i hated her at the same time because of what she stands for. And the latter affected me more than anything else.
Having this mood set, i was driving a car, a red car. Don’t know what it was but it felt like it was an Enzo Ferrari lol. I had set a small bomb on the rear left wheel .
(my rear left wheel is the Achilles heel of all the cars im driving, the 2 times my car oversteered and lost control it was when i was turning hard on the right.
The only time my car had a flat tyre was the rear left wheel, and twice back last holiday, did the kembara and the estima suffered explosive flats, both on the rear left wheel, the significance of this wheel still perplexes me)
So, she was standing on one corner, in a parking lot, i saw her from about 50 metres away, and drove towards her at excessive speeds. Then as i was nearing her, i set the bomb off while i was braking hard on the brake pedals. Because the bomb went off, it pushed the car upwards, and all the tyres lost grip. The whole car jumped, bounced and skidded, wedging her on the waist.
Her body, separated from waist down and up, died instantly.
I dreamt that i committed a premeditated murder. Killing people in my dreams are common, but even so it takes ALOT of energy to kill someone, i remembered after the height of the Kok Yew incident, i dreamt that i had beaten him to death with my bare fists, but it took ALOT of pounding before he stopped breathing. This dream however, killing was so, so easy.

Interpretation:
Killing people, like i said is common in my dreams. But different from the others, this person which i killed was a woman, which is a first. And that it was so easy to execute was another novelty.
But the most perplexing thing about this dream was, usually i kill on the basis of hate. The people which i have “killed” in my dreams were all people that i hated in life. This woman, which i didn’t hate, stood between the person that i love.
I guess making a killing for love is easier than killing for hate?

On a whole, thinking at why i have all these dreams, i looked at my well being on the CONSCIOUS level. As some of you already know, lately i have been happy. Nothing much to complain or emo about. Lifes been good, unlike 2006-8 where its a constant up and down, lotsa mood swings and annoying splinters in my head that make me cringe everytime i think of them at a conscious level.
Being so accustomed to emotional violence and turmoil, i think my brain is reacting negatively to the peacefulness that is my life now. It feels that im currently “unhealthy” from the lack of violence in my conscious hours since its accustomed to bloodshed. So, to make up for all this “peace and serenity”, it manifests itself, it asserts its presence which it deems necessary in my subconscious mind – dreams.
I told this to Beets about my dreams, and she said “oh let me piss you off and create some emo in you, so you’d stop getting nightmares!”
I replied “Hah! Id rather get nightmares than have you being angry or emoing at me”.
She said “then, can you find someone else to piss you off? So that youd get some anger in your conscious mind?”
=.=||, shes odd i tell you lol.
She continued “maybe its because i always wish you ‘good night and sweet dreams’, what if i do the opposite?”
Me: “opposite? Like what? Not wishing me at all?”
Beets: “no, like ‘happy nightmares’ and good night’ or something like that”
Me: =.=|||

Dear Beets, appreciate your kind thoughts, but, no thanks lol.

By The Feathers of Mercury

2009-05-18T20:34:00.001+08:00

The featherless Arrow leaves the Bow,
With a deafening, thunderous twang.
A seemingly straight arc without a fro,
Where it lands should craft a bang.

Tremble and shake as the Arrow flies,
As the Arrow is featherless as it is,
Even while soaring amidst the great blue skies,
Should the featherless Arrow spin to a miss.

Now Graced by the feathers of Mercury,
The flight of the Arrow takes a new womb.
Now Touched by the lessons of His story,
The feathered Arrow is lead stray from the tomb.

To Cross The River Styx

2009-05-16T01:25:00.000+08:00

Love can be such cruelty, such hurt, such sorrow;
So tormenting, demeaning, like no light of morrow.
If only one could acquire Eros’ lead-tipped arrow-
One pierce will suffice in the other’s heart’s harrow.

Or if one could stop Aphrodite’s song at the verse,
Then this unwelcome sentiment is set in reverse.
Or if one would wilfully receive Daphne’s curse,
Then we shall not witness this tragedy’s worse.

As clear as Hades’ duties never fail,
As lucid as Demeter’s grieving wail,
A maiden’s voyage shall never sail-
if the wind is measured by a Crooked Scale.

Unless this anguish is your own vicious glee;
Your stifled suffering is without decree.
Deaden your heart and the agony shall flee.
In the end it is abstinence that sets you free.

Fail

2009-05-13T08:04:00.002+08:00

Gah, for the first time in 3 years, I've failed a history assignment :( well, i was 1 day late, hence got a 5% mark penalty... got a 54% initially, take 5% off, its a 49...

Its weird how things cycle like this, what i mean is, majoring in both history and journalism, 1st year i found journalism really easy, and history tough, but i scored alot better in journalism than history. 2nd year into arts, and there was a reverse, i was getting good marks in some history subjects, but did quite horribly in other journalism stuff..

now at my final year, journalism all of a sudden felt really easy, and im getting Distinctions when i only put in half the effort i put in History wherelse im doing poorly in history, only getting passes, and today failed one... sigh...

this being my final year, i hope i dont fail the whole subject as a whole. I NEED TO GRADUATE NAO.

Get Rich Quick Scheme, But First You have to be Rich

2009-05-06T08:11:00.002+08:00

Nearing the completion of my studies, the undeniable, inevitable question is then "how do i start making money? preferably lots of money?"

If someone tells you "i dont want to be rich, i just want to be happy", you can look at them with a queer eye and it is hence safe to assume:

1. this guy is a hippy and is against the war Viet-American war, which is already over.
2. because he/she is a hippy, he/she does drugs and thus is "always" happy when theyre baked or on drugs
3. this person leads a fairy tale life where seashells and various crustacious carcasses are used as currency in their realm
4. because this person lives in a fantasy, theres always that beautiful maiden or knight in shining armour that comes by at the end and they live happily ever after.

But as normal people, who live in the "real" world know that happy endings are unreal, and if they are real, its usually not as happy as the ones they depict in those pop-up story books we buy for 19.90.

that white square box shaped sticker at the back corner of those fairytale books pretty much sums up the general nature of life...

Happy Endings dont come free; they cost 19.90bucks a piece.

same with every other deals we make in real life, where theres always a price tag hidden somewhere, and at the end of every transaction theres some monetary worth attached.

so much to the point, i bet what sits at the end of the long dark tunnel, where the light is, is a dollar bill, or a muzzle flash from the long end of a shotgun for those who cant make ends meet.

So, how does one make "ends meet"?

Capitalism, is the ideology of today. Many years ago when China was in turmoil in all sectors, social, governmental, financial you name it, theyve got it. Father told me in a phone convo not so long ago - Deng Xiao Ping said these famous words -

"Only Capitalism can save China"

now with the economy in the shithole, people say

"Only China can save Capitalism"

the irony. Whats more so is that, as Moe highlighed- as a person of chinese ethnicity, our ancestors traveled away from China to set their marks on other countries to generate riches for themselves. but now, only after a century, we find ourselves doing the reverse for the same purpose.

Our ancestors came down to do tasks of all shapes and sizes. from Entrepenuers who gather raw materials to be then crafted into ..stuff (those who have been to China know for a fact theres definately no shortage of professional skilled workers in this regard), which in turn is sold for a higher price.

Some came down as "Manual Labourers" (as opposed to... Automatic Labourers?) to do all the heavy lifting.

Some came down to be employees, some employers.

Truth be told, after a century, industrial modes of production and capitalism have since evolved.

Previously the only way to generate funds back in the times of our ancestors (a century or so ago) is by selling, or providing something that people need. The only way to do that, is if/when you have that needed commodity, Be it material goods, such as furniture and such, or services like being a lawyer or having an asshole...and are willing to part with it for some dough.

Nowadays, with the advent of technology and the whole credit system, it seems one can sell things they dont already have.

I read in Dr. Mahathir's blog, on Banking... Banks in the 21st century play a vital, but unbalanced role of generating wealth for its investors, owners and country. one of its functions is to give out loans, and from that, coupled with the mechanics of interest comes income.

a crude example would be, if a bank lends out 100dollars for 10 days, the interest is 0.1%. on a 100$ basis thats not alot, but imagine if the collective sum goes over the millions.

to add to that, banks nowadays (quote from Dr. Mahathir's blog), large banks of today are "allowed" to lend more money than they have; over 10 times the real-amount the bank has. so if the bank has 1000$ in total, then 0.1% generated from 1000 is as such, but take 1000 and x10. 10,000 and 1000 has a significant difference, especially if you bring it up to the real sum as opposed to my under-exagerration of international bank assets.

so where did that 10x come from? the answer is "thin air".

previously when a bank can only lend as much money as they actually have from deposits, its fair game, because as ive highlighted earlier, one sell's its services or commodities that they ACTUALLY own.

Now however, its like ... imagine you go to a shop to buy a chocolate bar, and that shop only has 10 chocolate bars, and they were all sold out before you get there, the shopkeeper says to you "oh, go over next door and you can take one of their bars, but pay me first". this shopkeeper doesnt own the next shop! he's charging you for selling you something that is not his/hers to begin with!

awesome! So it seems that the only way to generate money out of thin air, (with money being the fabric that holds our time-space continum) is by starting a bank!

i did a google search on "how to open a bank", and "how to start a banking business", the results came out in the same light, with articles telling you how to open a "Bank Account". which isnt what i want...

Did i put the word "Account" on the keyword search? No! google needs to L2read...

But from friends, i heard you need absurb amounts of money to start your own bank. like, in the many millions or billions.

so it appears that, the only people able to pull money from their ass (literrally) is by being rich in the first place! oh what injustice.

Maybe i'll buy a fairytale book... and smoke a joint while im at it... seems thats the only way to go :(

UDM Brothers and Waterworks Reserve (part 2)

2009-05-01T20:44:00.003+08:00

UDM Brothers and Waterworks Reserve (part 1)

2009-04-30T08:53:00.004+08:00

Pictorial Post. Got a new Camera, thought id play with it since the wet grip of rainy weather loosened abit today. Was initially heading to Mt Nelson Signal Station, but decided on Waterworks Reserve at Dynnrye (spelling) first.

Upon Reaching there, I unexpectedly bumped into an E46 330Ci. The owner was no where in sight, so i camwhored it :P anyway, here are the pictures for the scenery, i'll put up the car ones later, since my net is shafting me with its Uber slow speeds.

Reminds me of Icecream

2009-04-28T21:46:00.002+08:00

I managed to catch up with an old friend, whom i have never personally met. Her name is Leah, after talking to her for abit, alot actually, we decided to start a mini project, where Leah and I would contribute a few paragraphs into a blogsite to create a constantly changing story. I know its not a novel approach as people have been doing this for awhile already, but i would stand for observing an experience and going through one is very different.

I think the results would be interesting, and the process would no doubt be lots of fun!

heres the bloglink if youre ever interested for a random read.

raw URL:
remindsmeoficecream.blogspot.com

My Struggle

2009-04-27T00:06:00.002+08:00

I just finnished one of my major essays on Media Culture which speaks of inequality propagated by Ideology through the mass media.

anyway, just thought id jazz it up - i've got Hitler's Mein Kampf in my reference list, lol.

Dying Breed

2009-04-22T10:22:00.002+08:00

Lately, i managed to watch a show called "Dying Breed". saw it sitting on a shelf in blockbuster rentals, and the cover has "B-GRADE" written all over it, but being desperate for some passive entertainment i thought id pick it up and see what its all about. The back of the cover said that it was produced by the same people who did "Wrong Turn", so i kinda understood what kinda movie its gonna be like, but it also said it was done by the dudes from SAW, not just ANY SAW, SAW 1!!!! that got me all excited, but after reading into it abit more, the only bit of SAW 1 im gonna see in that movie is the main actor. forgot his name.

anyway, just before putting it back on the shelf, at the corner of my eye i spotted the word "Tasmania". "No shit" i said to myself, it was shot in Tasmania, ABOUT Tasmania and Tasmanians, well not really Tasmanians, but a small portion (really small) of the demographic.

Bam, its off to the counter, im watching this for sure.

Anyway, the movie is about Alexander Pearce, whom they call the "Pieman". He was a convict who escaped the prisons here during colonial times. he was later caught again, and hung, for running his ass out of prison, and also Cannibalism... juicy.

so the story develops around the myths of Alexander Pearce.

Being a gorrorfilm, yes there was lotsa blood. but other than that, the movie was kinda...how do you say it, to phrase it in a less exquisite way - "quite shit".

Slow introductions, with lots of jump-cut-ins of horrofic pictures, abit like Fight Club style cinematography, you get the drift. Sex scenes included to jazz it all up.

but really, what i got the show for was just to see Tasmania on the big screen lol, it was quite interesting, alas none of the places i was familiar with were featured.

all in all, okay lah. 2.5/5, not the worst ive seen, still stomachable.

p:s/ damn ssien the fact i cant comment on Ben's blog :( glad you enjoyed my company, its likewise for me, always good to see old friends in new times ;D

Chat wtih Dr. Warren

2009-04-21T08:31:00.003+08:00

I was heading up to the computer labs, then saw Dr Warren just chillin on the foyer with a cup of coffee, so i thought id have a chat with him as in the past hes been very nice to me, and also being a great lecturer and tutor back in year 2.

Already having a question in mind, it wasnt hard to start a coversation.

In my final year of my arts degree, majoring in journalism and history, alot of people ask me this - "what are you going to do after you graduate? job wise."

right now, thats the hardest question anyone can throw at me. if someone asked me what do i think about blackholes and how the universe came to be id prolly have more elaborate and accurate answers. ask me the former, id tell you theres a blackhole in my head where nothing comes out, i cant even shed a hint of light on that subject matter.

Dr. Warren, having held a doctorate title in sociology (and journalism i think) for many years, i asked him how was it like. Apparently, it takes 7 years part time. After being in the academic grinder for.... more than 20 years including kindergarten, im not very keen to add another 7 to it, whats more that 7 years is not a guarantee that it would yield the desired results.

back tracking abit, the prospect of teaching, say history in a university level, is very good. i mean, the jobs fine, judging from attendig lectures, it can be quite relaxing and at the same time interesting meeting students from all over the world. theres one down side to it, that is the aforementioned 7 years ontop on an honours (2 years) and masters (2 years) degree. thats easily 10 years or so D:

Having gasped at the huge 7, Dr Warren said "well, you can do it full time, and its around 3-4 years, thats if you dont do anything else" he paused "like eating and sleeping etcetera..." he then bellowed a squinting laugh.

succesfully completing the trials and gauntlets to holding a phD is not many can (would) weather through... Dr Warren only said "well, it hurt a little" then held one of his triceps as if i had just thrown him a sucker punch on his arm, again smiling as he said that.

being in arts, doing journalism and history, he said i could go with the obvious, as in work in the local news company, doing writting and reporting... or on the history side of my degree, i could work with the government.

"the government?" i asked

"yeah, like library archiving, or even research. some departments would like a historical perspective on the things that they do".

having not really understanding that last bit, i wanted to clarify with him, but time ran out, apparently he was just out getting a cuppa while his tutorial class was gathering materials amongst themselves to prepare for an in-class debate. so we just left it at there.

but before he left, he told me to put some thought into it, dont just jump in, because once you start work, its a big commitment that lasts godknows how long.

that struck me, and i was immediately reminded of Moe's situation. Maybe i should take some time off after this is done, but yet again, time isnt really on my side as ive took long enough to complete something that doesnt take as long as i took to complete.

-------------------------------------

on a side note, with the current standing of the world economy, one would expect everyone who is unemployed whose diligent enough to apply for a job is keen enough to grab hold onto any job they can find?

reading a local paper during the easter week, one guy turned in an article showing his frustration with the newbies applying for work.

apparently his company gave out 10 interviews that week, only 5 decided to show up to those interviews, 3 were complacent enough to get a spot in the office, but 2 of the 3 did not show up for the first day of work.

i told Choke about that article and he was like "what the hell, give me the job la wei".

tsktsk

Observations of the Universe

2009-03-31T21:51:00.002+08:00

I was queing up in woollies, getting some essential stuff, toilet paper, detergent etc etc...

this guy infront of me, he was well-built. Biceps showing under his tight t-shirt. Skinny blue jeans with a red-striped nylon keychain hanging out from his back pocket. That however wasnt what which made me notice him in the first place.

This dude, bought a box of 12pack condoms, a bottle of petroleum jelly, a homebrand box of tissue and...

...a stapler...

What the Beholder Sees

2009-03-22T23:02:00.001+09:00

She had a consecrating smile,
Hallowed, sacred but also dreadfully vile.
A glare so tender it’s cruel,
To the beholder for what he beholds is beautiful.

Peace, love and serenity.
Her grace is tranquillity.
Her presence alone uplift s the soul,
And once again, makes me whole

On Dung

2009-03-10T08:49:00.002+09:00

Imagine...

Youre walking in the forest, and you come across a piece of dung.

Now, Imagine again, the same situation, just that this piece of dung you come across has many, i mean, many small, white maggot like slugs crawling in and out of it. Ewww, i know, but to a laymen, that just probably means that piece of feces there has been there, for awhile at least. Time enough for them flies to sit and lay a couple...

Now, Imagine again.
Youre walking in the forest, the Tasmanian Forest to be exact, and you come across, not a piece of dung, but a Tasmanian Devil, in the midst of laying a dung. After its done, it looks at you, sniffs you for a sec and runs off into the bush.

You examine the dung (15 seconds after its laid), and see white maggot like slugs crawling on, in then out of that piece of freshly laid dung...

o.O

my expression was precisely that. These animals eat partially rotten meat. Mice, Rabbit, Wallaby, Kangaroo road kills, and in the process, ingested maggot eggs and other various types of necro-worms. It goes into its (Tasmanian Devils) stomach, and comes out the other end- Hatched and ready to squirm.

I had the priviledge to see this all, in the Tasmanian National WildLife parks.

So, Ben, this was the thing i wanted to tell you. That satchet of Tasmanian Dung hanging on your room door... and i have to say this...

LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL

Mercury Bird

2009-03-06T23:26:00.003+09:00

Oh the stupidity, the innocence, the mind thats ill!
Oh the infamy, the disaster, how absurd!
Oh how naive, the idiocy, the ridicule!
To even think, to tame the Mercury Bird...

Brain Freeze

2009-03-04T08:42:00.002+09:00

Not in a literal sense, but also in a literal sense.

It seems when you're happy, you dont blog. Or at least thats the case for me. Being a little abibliophobic, i logged on to friend's blogs, and they too, like Choke, is "suffering" from mania, and hence have nothing to write about.

oh well, its a good thing i guess... may or may not, this "happiness" last.

amen bros

The Hermit

2009-02-14T21:19:00.002+09:00

I am the Hermit, the monk, who chants of Solitude.
I am that old toy, that used shoe, damned on a dust-filled shelf.
If no one should long to reap my Fortitude,
Then I shall commit my mind, my soul, my wisdom, to myself.

For her, For Her

2009-02-11T04:21:00.003+09:00

Dear Rowy, Because you are inherently blurrrr, I figured I should expressively say this is for you. With all due respects, May She Rest Eternally.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
As the snow steadily falls off the winter sky,
That which casts all her mind in ghastly white.
Should she shed a tear or wail a cry,
There’s no hindering Her ebbing light.

As certain as the Larks fly south,
As deafening as when lightning cracks,
As dire a place like Cerberus’ mouth;
Is as evident the love she now lacks.

Earthly though that which she is deprived,
Since Her vigor ceased but Her soul survived,
In bodily death doth her kindred part,
Worry not dear friend, for She lives on- in your Heart.

Can I Get You a Drink?

2009-01-24T06:05:00.005+09:00

The term "Culture-shock" is used ever more frequently in the rapidly shrinking world, where more and more people are exposed to different cultures at an exponential pace. The simple, yet benevelont question of "Can I get you a drink" is practiced as culture in many parts of the world. To me, that in itself is a "shocker" not because it opens up countless posibilities between two human beings, but because of the sheer simplicity and innocence of it all.

Quite often but not exhaustive by all means, that question is initiated by a gentlemen to a lovely lady at the other end of the bar. This simple gesture of goodwill is what bridges two strangers together, who previously had nothing in common. Now that they each have a glass between and through the ensuing exchange of conversation, meant that it is quite possible the two have embarked on a journey together to forge a beautiful friendship. This same simple gesture however, has come a long way.

Reading the newspapers every morning, there is always that plethora of articles stating that persons xyz has either been robbed, raped, murdered, any of the said combinations or all together in a grim package, not surprisingly, these victims are usually female

Its an undeniable fact that clubbing and pubbing is a worldwide trend of late, the girls who go there, although each having their own agenda, it is safe to assume most attendees just want to have a jolly good time valving off all the pressure built up at work over the weekdays. These nights are usually innocent, but blood and malice taints the night air once too often.

Stories of men and women, both young and old falling to the old spiked-drink trick is heard too many times in the local scene. Some, just by being gullible, fall prey to the malignant perpetrator's mere persistent persuasion. Others, sadly were subdued by brute, barbarous force.

These heinous acts by all means are not limited to clubs and nightscenes; of late, even shopping malls have become a hotbed for these pests of our society to set in motion their atrocious deception- preying on just about anyone and literally, anywhere. To put my point across, a lady was raped several times as reported in a local paper on 23 Janauary 2009. Her mistake? The cab she hailed was driven by a parasite; IT even had the audacity to demand for the fare she allegedly owed the animal afterwards.

"Ideally" speaking, once netted by the authorities, these criminals, like the insects they are, should be eradicated.

Accounts like these has set the precedence for all men and women in the country, bringing everyone to the edge- merely the slightest contact with these germs of society can be fatal. This undoubtedly has pushed everyone to the brink of paranoia.

Maybe foreigners will be culture-shocked one day when they visit Malaysia and hit the local nightscene, where a simple, benevelont act is returned with a paranoid, delusional response, coupled with a free ride to the police station- just because he asked "Can I get you a drink?".

Keeper of Thorns and Splinters

2009-01-20T01:46:00.000+09:00

Prometheus bears our world unannounced,
Apollo chariots its hold unpronounced,
Nay Scorpio yell “woe”, of its malicious tail,
Nay Achilles shout “foul”, when his mortal heels fail.

Creatures of Ur wield their lumber
Twas thus meaningful for all to encumber
Their lives with fortitude, with life,
With gratitude, with discord, with strife.

But all who are hellishly burdened need not halt
Their existence, seemingly thriving with heavenly fault,
For there existed earthen allies who outstretch
Their arms in own forfeit, to aid their links in wretch.

Those then who forsake their own abandon;
Who deemed aids and abets redundant;
Who judged amity and pity a mere specter;
Should sovereign their own barbed scepter.

In the pits, the relief descends a ladder
For the upturned-fanged adder
Already poisoned by its own venoms,
Denies respite despite righteous fathoms.

Keep thy own crown of brambles.
For it be thy own passion’s shambles.

What Makes

2008-12-13T02:55:00.002+09:00

What makes a truth, a truth?
is it just, because the apples fall?
or when the fairies collect your tooth?
or is it, the blood stains on the wall?

What makes a lie, a lie?
is it just, the cockoos not at dawns?
or when murderers asks us 'why'?
or is it, the twisted horn of fauns?

What makes a joke, a joke?
Is it, treason under a jester's hat?
or when ones pelted with a rotten yolk?
or is it, when death is what you laugh at?

What makes a god, a god?
is it just, because it made the earth?
or when this prophet's claims are not too odd?
or is it just, some grandeurism or luck at birth?

What makes a man, a man?
it is, virtues presist when all's amiss;
is when he assists in methods he can;
and it is, in truth, in lie or in joke-
he keeps his promise.

Chaos Theory

2008-11-16T18:41:00.003+09:00

"Ever hear a Chaos Theory? Its a science, that tries to determine the patterns in chaotic systems, weather, ocean currents, blood flow that sort of thing... But it turns out, there are a few things more chaotic than the beat of the human heart- speeding up, slowing down, pretty face, flight of stairs, -its always changing depending on whats happening to us out there. Its an erratic sonofabitch. But Underneath all that mess, there is infact a pattern, a truth - and that is Love.

the most important thing about love, is that we choose to give it, and we choose to receive it; making it the least random act in the entire universe. It transcends blood, it transcends betrayal, and all the dirt, that makes us human."

Point to Ponder

2008-11-10T14:09:00.002+09:00

Have you ever wondered why, the coin return slots in vending machines are always so small? I have particularly small hands with particularly small fingers, and im having some difficulty putting my index and middle fingers into that small hole in my attempt to recover the change.

its not that the machine is so complex that the rest of the space is occupied by compplex-machinary, and, if im not mistaken, to cut a bigger hole = less materials needed? or are they not expecting a big number of coins coming out of that hole? certainly that cant be right because of thats the case, why allow notes as big as $10 to go in the payment chute? $10 to buy a $2 drink, thats gonna be a lot of coins, especially so if its all silvers and no golds.

OR? could it be, its to stop fat people with obscenely fat fingers from getting their change back? thats cruel...

Social Announcement

2008-11-05T12:07:00.003+09:00

The socially informed will tell you, there are certain things you cant do on your 1st date with someone, such as, errr, attempting to kiss the person(maybe on the cheeks depending on local culture), talk about your ex partner as a conversation topic, telling him/her that you have a habit of sleeping stark-naked etc etc. But that’s for dates.

What about for people meeting for the 1st time?

if this is the case, and would like to know him/her better? Theres a wide belief that asking for someone’s number on the 1st meeting would signify the other party that you’re desperate to know them better, or just to have an extra set of numbers in your phone book should you need a booty call some lonely evening. Of course, that’s not “polite” or “socially acceptable” behaviour. Some will tell you “it hurts the long term process”, trying to “build castles in a day” scenario as they will inevitably collapse one day soon.

So, 1st meeting taboo – No Telephone Number requests.

BUT, obviously im not the 1st person in the world to address this issue. Somewhere, some place in this world, millions have talked about this already.

Some “genius” (note the inverted commas) have thought about this taboo. It is a taboo because, like aforementioned – asking for their number too soon means youre too desperate to wait for a finer day. So, this Desperate Genius, who also happens to be adept at computers and browser designs, thought of a way to override, or bypass this “taboo”. He/She thought day and night, desperately needing a way to satiate his/her desperate need for acquiring the Other’s number. The result of this endless brooding is the hell of a spawn – Facebook.

Nowadays, on a first meeting, people no longer ask “can I get your number”, they ask “do you have facebook?” (or friendster or myspace, cousins of the devil), because Facebook whoring, being a relatively new internet/Cultural phenomenon, even if it’s a “bad thing”, its not written down in Book of Taboos 101 yet. Perhaps maybe someday it will.

Now, weighing the advantages and disadvantages of using facebook as an opening contact line instead of the good old “can I have your number” – Lets see.

Facebook:
1. Counters the phone number taboo, hence proving “You Are Not Desperate”
2. some chicks dig it
3. shows that you have a computer…
4. …and know how to use SOME of its functions
5. once the other side sees your facebook account, the “number of friends” counter showing at 6million, will prima facie show them “you are actually rather popular” and have “many friends”
6. Facebook never runs out of credit like prepaid phones do
7. its “new school”
8. more importantly, people have the benefit and luxury of playing this meeting game within a shroud of anonymity. What I mean by this is, people dare to speak themselves out more openly in text/via the internet, than talking to a person face to face or, through the phone(Ball-less approach if you want my personal opinion, don’t get me a hypocrite; I’ll talk with you about this in person if you request for this  )

and the list goes on.

However, given the “advantages” of using facebook instead of asking for a few digit number, it doesn’t change the fact that ITS STILL A short-turkey way of getting a contact!

Its easy, its hasn’t been “taboofied”, you get to remain a certain level of anonymity hence have the balls to talk balls… none of which one should be proud of, or take advantage of.

So, the true social moral here IS:

If you’re NOT desperate, and don’t want to appear so, DON’T ASK for contact details of ANY FORM, including Myface or Spacebook or any of the sort.

If you are NOT desperate BUT honestly sincerely want to know this someone better, ASK for a PHONE NUMBER or a SECOND DATE, because some browser program isn’t going to allow you to “KNOW someone better”

If you are DESPERATE, suck it up as ASK for a phone number because taking THE shortcut (Facebook) is the same as building a castle in a day (unless you’ve got an army of slaves that are all expert builders and engineers, metaphorically speaking)

I emplore you to ask yourselves the next time youre put in the situation stated above;

"Which is the Real Taboo?"

Flick of a Switch

2008-11-01T11:36:00.002+09:00

I was sitting outside on the porch, having a coffee, enjoying the warn sun, thinking of what question i should tackle next for the exam when a heard this loud buzzing above my head.

I thought myself "ah shit if its a bee it would be a bad time to get stung by it", then it flew away as quickly as it came. Having nothing around me except my slippers, i thought i would wield them with both hands and snap the bee between if it comes back.

Then immediately i felt guilty for having such cold-blooded murderous thoughts. "its just a bee, probably collecting nectar from the nearby plants"

The buzzing noise came right after i had that revelation, and found out, instead of it being a bee,

it was a mother huge fly.

...

"kill that fucker."

A Famous Man...

2008-10-26T23:38:00.005+09:00

...Once said,

'I think, Therefore I am"

what about?

"I Dont think, therefore I am not"?

Last night, I Dreamt... So what does that make me? Of course, that would depend on what exactly did I dream about.

Last Night, I Dreamt about God. Before we go any further, I want to clarify this is not your average Christian Bible Jesus, or your Quran Allah. This is just God, in its purest form. I Dreamt of my own personal "judgement day" or its equivalent.

What happened was, This magnificient presence just appeared infront of me. well, it started out that way, but almost immediately, I could feel the presence of a much, much superior than thou being all around me. Its not the 1st time this happened, infact, its happened many times before. the most recent occurance was when i was in Melb during the mid sem breaks, when i was asleep in Choke's room.

Like that time, the presence was great. But unlike that time, this time, it was my own judgement day, or night, well since it happened at night.

What i saw was... its hard to explain in words, because these are pure emotions and sensations felt only by the body and mind, MY body and mind. It was as if, my entire life's mistakes, vices, troubles and trauma were showed to me in a fraction of a second. I tell you, It is... absolutely... Overwhelming.

It was overwhelmingly painful. The agony of instantaneous and continuous regret is immeasurable, so much my mortal body could not really take it.

Last night, I died a little, as the clutches of Death merely pricked me with its bony finger tips. It was an out-of-this-world experience.

How did i know all these? because the "dream" lasted for only a fraction of a second, because i only remember that much, and i am one hundred percent sure, that what i remembered was all that had happened. what i saw in that instantaneous flash, was all the things i did wrong, all the things i could have, would have, should have done in a different way i did in the past.

I woke up, face drenched in tears and sweat, and somehow had a feeling that if i shut my eyes then and go to sleep, theres a possible chance i might not wake up the next morning, for i have died in my sleep.

But after what i have just saw in my sleep, theres little motivation to live on.

Alas, to half my dissappointment but half grateful, i did wake up today.

If what i saw was indeed the workings of a greater conscience, then i believe that the "judgemend day" fabled in so many "holy texts" is NOT the ultimate end of sentient life. Half the world will roll over and die of their own agony they sewed into their lives; the other half, will live again, and repent their mistakes as sincerely possible.

God, that Famous "Man" does exist- But you have not met him(It) yet.

That Yellow Commodore

2008-10-03T17:49:00.003+08:00

A few days back i drove to woolies to get some groceries after a lecture. Pulling up into the carpark, i saw an empty slot on the left, so i drove forward abit, and prepared for a reverse-park manuever.

After the park was complete, i gave the handbrake a good yank, since mine doesnt work that well, looked out the window to see if there was anyone before i opened my door.

There was indeed, someone out the door. It was a girl, sitting in her yellow commodore, preparing to drive out to parking lot. Our eyes met in and instant. Feeling shy and suddenly overwhelmed by what was before my eyes, i forced a smile -not because i didnt want to smile at her, but for the sheer fact she was gorgeous as hell and i was nervous not to mention the fact i was also slightly stunned.

As quickly as it happened, both of us broke eye contact, as if she knew how i felt, - She looked down, away from me to end my sweet torment. At the corner of her lips, there was a tiny curve.

very Quickly, She turned her head to look at me once more, then just as fast, turned away and engaged her reverse gear. I waited for the nose of her car to pass by my door before i opened mine own door.

I stood out from my car, and still, couldnt help but look at her. From this point i could see that she was wearing a black spring dress littered with green, curling rose veins and rose petals, it had a wide-round collar and her sleeves were slightly flared and folded.

Her dress was beautiful, but her face and more importantly, that smile, albeit small, was enough to trump anything and everything else.

I could hear the dog-teeth in her gearbox disengage and re-engage as she moves the stick from reverse to first.

Before gently pushing her foot down at the pedal, she looked at me once more, this time, for the last time.

Realizing my gaze was still helplessly fixed on her, she smiled at me with great thanks and appreciation -which was appropriate, for my gaze could mean nothing else than "You're so beautiful".

I stood by my car, looking at her car's V6 engine grunting its way around the roundabout. although under the full rays of the Spring Sun, it felt as if the day was getting darker and darker, as that Yellow Commodore slowly but surely drove away...

At the Table

2008-09-30T23:53:00.002+08:00

Poker table to be precise. Recently, Couple of friends of mine and I play poker together as a group-activity.

We would gather up, 6-12 strong depending on the nights we play, and we'd talk about stuff while playing poker, anything really. Sometimes we talk about everything, sometimes, more specifically we talk about whats happening at our poker table.

And what i realized was, poker reflects alot of things we do in real life, all condensed down to a pack of cards.

Tonight, the lesson i've learnt derived from this incident:

Cant remember what were my cards exactly, but it looked as if it was a no-gamer, so i fold quite early in that single game. The rest of the guys had something in their hand, hence played big, and big (relatively) they played. $10 only to be raised by another $10 only to be outdone by $10 more, by the end of the deal, it turned out my hand was actually the biggest, and the pile of money in the pot was actually mine, if i played that is.

But i didnt play, and i didnt win that round.

Now, a normal human being would go "awwwwwwwwwwwwwww shit i shoudlve followed" or something along those lines. BUT, we dont have the gift of foresight, no one does, unless youre a psychic... so, except for the amusement and an empty warning to the winner of that round that you did infact HAD a hand -announcing your frustration to everyone at the table is as futile as hurling verbal insults to a deaf and annoying person. Afterall, what is the table going to do? pretend you actually played and give you the money in the pot?

No.

This happened to alot of people, almost everyone at one point or the other, then one of my friends said

"If it is not yours to take - it is not yours to take."

Drop the shit, straigthen your shit up and get ready for the next round, just like things in real life.

Trivia: "Sandwiches" were named after Earl of Sandwich -He needed something easy to eat while at the gambling table.

The Wall

2008-09-22T20:22:00.000+08:00

What is a Mistake?

In my book, to make a mistake is to partake in an action which yielded unsatisfactory or regretful results. Im Pretty sure if anyone else did keep a book, it would pretty much have the same definition as mine.

Another thing about mistakes is that, retribution usually follows. Retribution is usually the agent of the abovementioned remorse, or it could work retrospectively, or vice-versa. When I was young, when i made a bad mistake, i was told by my father to face the wall, and rethink my actions. I hated the fact i made that mistake not because it affected whatever entailed my mistake, but the fact i had to face the wall.

Thinking back, why did i hate that wall so much? Because it made me look no where else, no one else to blame, no one else to place my mind on, all except myself. I look hard, i think deep, and it all comes clear. I hated what i saw, and what i saw was myself.

Now my dad, wise that he is, saw through me. He knew immediately when i saw what i did, and i was allowed to “leave” the wall, and having that perspective of myself again, but now however, i have to apply what i saw whilst facing the wall –in the real world once more. That being that, it was still a relief i no longer have to face that blank acre of painted concrete.

Since then, i dare not say i have never made a mistake ever again, but that little exercise with the wall has enabled me to think reflectively and see what and where went wrong –achieving the effect of facing the wall, without facing it.

Last year, i made a mistake. This mistake was not new to me as i have made it before in the past, many times in fact. My mistake was letting my ego out unrestrained. Not immediately, but after awhile i had realized it, but it was too late. The feared “regretful result” was already in effect.

Once again, I face the wall, receiving my retribution.

Now, after a year of realizing my mistake, i feel as if, i am still facing the wall. My old man isn’t here to tell me “its okay son, you can come out from the wall now”. Unlike how it used to be, even though now i know my mistake, i am still suffering from it’s reckoning.

So when? Can i leave the wall?

Man

2008-08-22T01:09:00.003+08:00

How can Man wage War?
with Hearts so Pure?
Ignorant to it's purpose,
Like Dumb fish to a Lure.

How can Man make Peace?
with an Iron Fist?
Wouldnt it be grand,
If The Letter was Kissed?

How can Mankind Kill?
Is His Will, Truely Ill?
like Devils in their Roost,
Or is it merely for the Thrill?

Why do Man do Hurt?
For Reasons so Absurd
For Logic so Untold
For Truths Unassured

The Ambiguity will not End;
So long there lives in this world- the Race of Man.

The Women...

2008-08-17T23:02:00.002+08:00

...in my life... All of which have impacted me in their own distinctive, respected and respective ways.
After reaching Choke’s blog, I felt obliged to say something to him. Since his message was conveyed in a blog-form, i’ll say it with and in my own blog. This is a bit More of a Mano to mano way.

Before i begin – Choke, This is not meant to agitate you, or to patronize in any way or form. Like i said,i feel obliged because youre going through a phase which i think i have endured and survived, feeling 10x better than i had been before.
*takes a deep breath* so here goes.

Human beings, men to be exact- which is what im focusing on primarily in this post- always posses a need, a need to belong with someone, usually a woman, unless youre gay.

This sense of longing is inherent and instinctive in every human being, unless youre an anti-social, or gay.

Now, choosing (or so we have the illusion of choice) a partner for every person is different, so far as the criteria goes. Some choose based on feelings, some choose based on looks, some choose for the similarities, some choose out of spite, some choose because of the differences the other significant person possess. Either way, there is a criteria that has to be met either way.

However, with that being said, “love” is a very abstract thing, and the word “criteria” is definitely not synonymous with the word “love”.
So the question now, is then – how do we choose who to love?

Rhetorical question

The answer is you don’t. You just fall in love with someone. So you can throw everything ive said before this out the window.

Now, in my personal life, i have “loved” a few people. Ask me why now and i definitely cant give you a definite answer. The only thing i could say about that “love” is, its definite.

Out of all my “lovers”, most of which ive had the pleasure and blessing of them “loving me back”, a.k.a we have been in a relationship together. However, there is one, this one exceptional case/person, whom i truly loved but had not received the same “returns” if we we’re to address all the effort and emotions put into her as an “investment”.

This girl, is called Jeretine.

To be honest, i wouldn’t say “i have never loved someone as much as her” cliché-ly and bluntly, but i can definitely say, “i have never loved anyone in the way i have loved her”.

(gosh this is getting extremely difficult to write because “love” is such an undefined word)

The thing is, i put myself out there, to be the best i can be, to be the better than most (almost all) men could ever be, but yet she did not feel the same way i felt for her. I spent money, emotion, energy and valuable time, all in a bid to “win” her heart.

Failed miserably.

I know we shouldn’t use the word “never, but i have never felt so miserable before in my life. God it sucked soooo much.

Then one night, it hit me. Why is love so painful? Why is loved so coveted when all it brings is pain and suffering?

I thought and pondered for a long time, and at the end of the night, i finally realized.

Love, is not an investment. You don’t throw things at it and expect it to be tossed right back. In a sadistic manner, love is a black hole, a special anomaly that exists just to drain your life away. But in an optimistic and religiously devoted way, Love is a boon, a buff that fortifies your very soul. It empowers you to do things you normally wouldn’t have done (ill explain this bit in a bit), now from here it can go two ways – bad and good.

The bad- you end up looking for another source of pain to cover over the pain you felt whilst loving someone. Cutting yourself, punching the wall, destroying your soul etc etc

The good- you end up having thoughts and deliberations like the ones ive had, and it makes you a stronger, better person.

Like Buddha said, all desires lead to suffering. The more you desire something, the more suffering you will get at the end.

Since my form of “love” when i was “with” Jeretine led me down this painful path, i looked at the other side of Love.

I asked myself, “why do i love her?”

The answer for me was “because it felt good loving her.” -note the full-stop.
Because nothing comes after a full-stop, its a “Full – Stop” get it?

Love is like the epitome of a rhetorical question- it doesnt need to be answered,

but like all human beings long to belong; like all rhetorical questions, people still ask them even though no answer is in order.

So from that morning on, i focused on just one thing. Loving her. And that was the end of it.

And boy did it feel good.

Multitasking

2008-08-13T10:13:00.002+08:00

You know the popular saying, well its not really a saying, But- its a general belief that women can multi-task better than men, or rather, some men cant multitask at all..

Multi-tasking can be applied to almost anything, anything that can be described as a "verb" can be multitasked... okay i just repeated myself.

what i really mean is, say, talking on the phone. when i talk on the phone, i cant use MSN or convey messages other than in the form of speech to anyone else. Nor can i read and talk at the same time.

When im going to class, things like this offen happen to me - i need to get my wallet from my room, but decided to brush my teeth 1st, so i brush my teeth, and after that when i walk into my room, i cant remember why i entered my room for, so i look around, found my pair of socks, and walk out... then thought "eh? my wallet", id then have to walk back in to get it.

after asking around for awhile, i also realized im not the only guy who have problems like these- alot of the guys ive "intervieweD" have to same woes as me.

Women on the otherhand, theyre like, multi-barreled tanks who can shoot at alot of targets at one time, a tank being a tank, it has threads as well, hence it can move AND shoot at multiple targets at the same instance.

Women can walk down a shopping isle, decide which tampons are the best value for money vs comfort, think about what to get in the next isle, paint their fingernails, talk on the phone and to their girlfriend next to them ALL AT THE SAME TIME.

is it just me? or is that a mighty powerful thing for someone to be able to accomplish?

Some women, can do their research essays, err researching i mean + write down notes + talk to me on msn + eating chips + again, on the phone with a friend + texting their moms and play Facebook games.

Of course, in their defence some men would say, the quality of the work done is mediocre, or downright bad. But in some instances my female peers have better results that i do, shops in a more effecient manner than me, can hold a more coherent conversation on the phone, write more complete text messages and have better painted fingernails than i do.

kudos id say.

However, there are somethings that annoy people, when they multitask when doing the task at hand..

Say, sex forexample.

again, through my very informal interviews, and even if i hadnt interviewed these people, its pretty much safe to say more men can achieve orgasm faster and easier than women. Some women, dont or never at all..

now i know what you girls are thinking...

"hes bad in bed!"
"small penis *makes a small gap between the indexfigner and the thumb*"
"bad breath"
"no momentum"
the list of excuses goes on.

but have they really thought about why? they cant get an orgasm?

if i could give my 2cents, id say women are multitasking.
Activities like sex, cant be multitasked.

Men, well, the typical male concentrates hard on what they do. they FOCUS at the matter at hand, or in this case, the girl under/above them. No wonder some men P-ME (its up to you to think what that abbv means), because they are so happy, or so aroused by the girl they are sleeping with, which is something the girl should be proud of, instead of giving him the cringing face or the *im going to bed* look.

Women on the other hand, when they DO it, they DO, other stuff as well..

well, not literrally speaking, they DO it in their mind.

"have i paid the bills yet?"
"do i look fat when im on top?"
"maybe ill suggest going under"
"oh shit i havent paid the bills"
"what if i get fine for late payment? that will mean i cant that pink purse i wanted! oh no! "
"hmm but the blue one looks better with my favourite top, and its cheapter too!"
"i think ill get the blue purse then, oh wait! my boyfriend DID pay the bills for me, so now what? should i get the pink? or the blue?"

*guy orgasms*

"what!? already?!"

/facepalm.

i wouldnt have made this up of course, some comedian actually did a sketch quite similiar to the example i just gave. i think i just plagiarised. but since i did mention, maybe its not plagiarism!

ANYWAYS

i wouldnt have said this without substantial proof. id say, its tested, and prooven that if you keep your mind OFF the matter at hand, ie. the partner your having an intimate moment with, you can REALLY delay the climax.

So, thats some multitasking skills a GUY needs and the same skill GIRLS should forget about.

Horror-scope

2008-07-29T12:38:00.002+08:00

I'm in the uni library, about to read up on the Napoleonic Wars.
I flip open the book, and phew, what a page-full. so i thought id get my brain warmed up before i really get into it... i read the blogs that i read, checked my e-mails, paid my bills, oh speaking of email, i have a subscription (free of course) with the Astrology.com guys, and heres my horoscope.

"Dear Roy,
Here is your horoscope
for Tuesday, July 29:

That brain of yours is making the right kinds of trouble again and you ought to be able to have fun while stimulating your intellect at the same time. If you're looking for love, try the library".

I AM im the library!

*looks around*

Betrayal is the Oldest Of Sins

2008-07-28T10:07:00.000+08:00

Remember the time you lifted your heart to someone else’s chest, willing to give it to them for safekeeping, because there is nowhere else you want your heart to be.

For a brief moment you have Tranquillity,
For another moment there was Serenity,
But shattered your body, broken your mind,
When ultimately you find,
That which had made you will be the one who will break
You, as she called you- her “biggest mistake”.

Malaysia - Remember to Smile

2008-07-24T09:18:00.003+08:00

Because I've missed orientation week, I had to rush all my enrollments in a single morning. Also, Because of the fact i was rushing, I had to cover a lot of distance in a very short amount of time, and because im running about, i "bumped" into a lot of people.

So, it happened right at the start, i opened this door to get thru, just so there was this other lady on the other side, wanting to come out... being a gentlemen that i am, *cough* i held the door open, and signaled through the glass partition for her to pass, she looked very delighted, lowered her head, stepped out and said "thank you" with a biiiiig smile on her face.

"that felt good", i said to my self in my mind.

Because its winter, well actually, its like that all year round - the uni hallways are filled with doors and tight narrow turns where the corridors end, very often bumping into people on the other side, they all either said "sorry" when they nearly hit me or vice versa (even when it was my fault for running obscenely fast into the turns) or "you're alright" or "no worries" when i said "im sorry" for being such a hooligan. All of which, are accompanied by a huge smile.

so, that day, i decided to count the number of thank yous, youre welcomes, and sorries ive received that day.

well, the total number i got was.... errrr... i lost count ...

..yep thats how many i've got..

It then made me think, of the time i was in Malaysia... there was this one time i went to 7-11, to get a drink to cure my hangover. upon reaching the door, because it was transparent i saw a middle aged couple walking out, i opened the doors, and held it there, waiting for them to walk out... but as they did, both man and woman did not utter a word to me, not even a smile. all they did was looked at me as they proceeded through, and on their face, it said "this is how it should be, little chinese boy opening doors for malay couples."

"maybe theyre having a bad day?" i consoled myself, embarrassed by my countrymen.

so i got my drink, went to the counter to pay, and i said "hello, hows it going?" at the cashier.

she looked at me, without saying a word, beeped the bar code, looked at me, waited for me to hand over my money, so i did, whilst doing that, she looked at me, head covered in a "tudung", gave me my change, looked at me, feeling awkward, i broke the silence by saying "thank you", but she, just.. looked at me again.

i took my change, and left. puzzled

going out, another dude was walking in, so i thought, lets try it again, i opened the door, and held it open...

not to my great surprise, the dude walked in again, without acknowledging me at all. , no smile, no thank you or whatsoever. what he DID tho however, was again look at me and the exact same impression ""this is how it should be, little chinese boy opening doors for malay people".

right then and there, i really wished i had godly powers, and bind his hands to the door- to be punished to open that 7-11 door for people for eternity. oh while im at it, id glue the side of his lips up so he would be smiling forever too!

before you malay ppl say i'm racially prejudiced, this has happened to me from all 3 main races of Malaysia. Chinese, indian AND malays.

have Malaysians forgotten how to smile? or the word "courtesy" does not exist in our vocabulary or conscience? I spend one morning in Tasmania, and i'll bet my left testicle i get more smiles from little courteous deeds that i do here than a life time in Malaysia.

Mountain Snow

2008-07-22T23:25:00.003+08:00

Oh Mountain Snow, so Fair and White
Your Tender touch, your simple Joy,
Your cold, Frigid Bite,
Your impishness- like a boy.

Oh Mountain Snow, Why Shy Away?
Is it our Scorching Hands? Our Burning Glare?
Or is just the Sun Keeping you at Bay?
Or at the foothills you are Rare?

Come Hither Mountain Snow
To Drown our Blood, To Wash our Sins

Come Nearer Mountain Snow
Let us spill our remorse onto you..

...so with you it shall flow,
and evaporate from below...

It is Over

2008-07-19T17:03:00.003+08:00

I start my car's engines, and it roars to life. The sun has set just moments ago. As i engage the 1st gear and release the clutch, i cant help but feel i have left something at the airport.

I give the throttle a jab, the car leaps forward with great finesse.
It is light, but my heart is heavy...

it was then flashbacks filled my head. The road from the airport back home, the yellow lines on the blackhighway- looked too much like the time i was rushing to Devonport to board the ship. Back then, my heart was filled with joy i smiled like an idiot. Going away from home just to arrive at another home....

Images, smells, tastes and presences filled my head...

..........................................

from the beginning...

The morning Melbournian skyline, the bustling city and beautiful cars on St.Kilda Road. Driving up Ben,Choke, Steven's drive way. that morning with Ben on the veranda... the 1st lunch in Orange House, Meeting up with Jason and Peishan, getting reacquainted with Pearly and Valery, it all seemed like just yesterday.

The movie marathons at Glen Waverly, the Air hockey games with William, the Battle gear games with Jacke, Shiro... Extorting money from the dealer at Crowns, also, watching and feeling the intense torches along the Yarra River, where Shiro wished for a bird to be scorched in its flames, the Burning Cigarette butt nearly hitting a perching seagull.

7-8 people crashing at Mckin's room, playing GT4 and ignoring our hunger pangs, the steak at that hotel on Lygon, the tom yum soup and gelato icecream in the freezing cold.

the immense parking bills... the shopping at DFO then stopping at Coffee Club for a Latte with bags under our seats...

The Great Ocean road, how Jason tailed William to both understeering and oversteering, How we froze our balls off waiting for water to sprout from a whales blowhole. The incredibly boring drive home, the pitstop at a picnic area, lying on the warm Civic hood, pointing at the stars pretending i know the constellations...

The Chocolate at Max Brenners, the Coffee at Swanston Street Starbucks, the Club Alumbra and our lame ass jokes and dances... the hangover meal at China Bar at 5am, evading police because we over filled our car with friends...

The time we all got drunk in Ben's room and started busting all our moves, Doing Michael Jacksons Thriller routine...

The Lunches and Dinner i had with MZ and Jacke, the mechanic and half-cut shop runs with Jacke and his UDM...

Watching and filming William driving Black Speedy...then near stalling, and near stalling and the final stalling of the car.

The Coffee/Gatorade Mix on the Clayton house back yard in the morning, scarmbling to solve that lvl 6 puzzle...

Picking Jason up at Avalon Airport.

The zerg/fast game fish and chips at Melbourne docks, the ramp going into the Spirit of Tasmania, again, the night skyline of Melbourne.

The Cruise, playing cards, ghost stories and personality talks with Valery, Choke and Ben... Waking up 1 hour later with a hangover without even drinking... prolly because of the poison i spat the night before... (Valery, sorry... if i was too brutal in what i said...)

The drive down from Devonport again, this time in the morning, along side Ben Lomond and the snow capped mountains, Subway at Campbell town, La Trobe's museum and antique shopping, the Roman Gardens...

Slouvakis and Mykonos, never tasted better...
Private rooms at Ball and Chain followed by the Epic Movie the Dark Knight.

Pei Shan jumping at the sounds made by the tour guide in Port Arthur's ghost tour... the hoggers on the road to Port Arthur.. The Tasmanian Devil's mechanical growl, the giant ass eagle trapped inside nets... trying to feed a very defensive wallaby...

The sub-zero tempretures at Mount Wellington, the snowball i pelted at Jasons jacket and him going "aaaaaaa oi!"

The Halo games, the crap talk in my room, Ring 2, Awake movies together, the ab tickling, fucking hell i havent laughed that hard yet that still before in my life...

The lunch at Saigon Kitchen..

"The Last Coffee" at the Hobart Airport, and cam whoring each other..

.....................

I pull up the drive way, parked my car, and looked at my passanger seat..

...my heart sank...

Looking at the drive way, it was only 4 days ago you guys were all here, praising the scenery... i looked across the Derwent River, its nothing spectacular... really..

it doesnt matter how great the sceneries are, its who you enjoy it with that matters most..

I take another glance, a pulsating light pierces the darkness above the city lights... i look at my clock, 7.08pm, the light- it is the plane you guys are on. So close yet so far... I wave, then salute, and nodded in full respect, pride and gratitude.

-------------
I Respect the men and women you have all become

I Take pride in having friends like you all

and Eternally grateful to have known beings of such grace and blunder.
-------------

I stare a little longer till the mechanical bird finally enters the clouds and dissappear into the night, and wonder if you are all looking back.

the clouds were kind enough to allow a few patches for starlight to come through. i look at them, some of them familiar, i close my eyes where the twinkling lingers in my mind. i concentrated fully, to imagine myself, being at Clayton, looking at the same stars on the same sky.

for a moment i succeeded, i opened my eyes in awe and comfort, only to return to where i really am, i look down, the birck tiles were familiar, yet goddamn alien.

Entering the door, the open sleeping bags, the untidy comforters, i hold on to them, trying to feel the warmth it harboured just this morning..

Four xbox controllers lie unanimated on the floor, and the familiar humming of the machine, i cant help, but give out a loud sigh..

Never had my room been so alive; bustling with noise, laugher and giggles... now all of a sudden - never have my room been so barren, silent and void of life..

an invisible tear rolled down on my cheeks, and my heart pumped hollow blood through my veins...

It is over, like the end of a chapter, a page turns to bury the one before it.. but like a never ending book, a new chapter flips in to fill the page, empty, stark, but full of potential - ready to be written again..

So Ive Been Thinking...

2008-07-04T21:28:00.002+08:00

...you know in modern days, ie. today, and tmr, and the day after that, we humans as a species always have to make certain decisions which will affect our immediate future and beyond, like - buying a car for instance.

So, when you buy a car, or anything as a matter of fact, but id like to use a car as an anology because to most people, its a big investment, and will affect/impact your life for years to come, like say 5 years or so, which in my honest opinion is a long time - if you plan to live until 55 years old, you only have 10 or so "5 years" to spend.

so back to the topic, buying a car. of course there are certain criterias the car must meet - the make, the model, the looks, the price tag of course, the maintainence, whether or not the car will suit your needs or purposes you intend to use the car for - the list goes on.

say forexample, you just want to commute to work and back, a Honda Jazz would be your best pick, quite new, quite modern, quite cheap, quite powerful (for the said need), quite low maintainence etc...

on the other hand, if you plan to go purely for aesthetics, like an Alfa Romeo, theyre gorgeously beautiful, but, their flappy paddle gearboxes fail half the time, the electronics dont coincide with the price tag, and yesm speaking of price tags, they arent exactly - cheap.

Now, take what ive just said, and put it in a human vs human way. of course you cant "BUY" a human or a person, well, thats arguable because in some cases you can, but lets just disregard that. the closest we have to "owning" another sentient human being is by going into a relationship with them. Ie, girlfriends- Boyfriends, husband and wife scenario.

now, people, unlike cars, dont have their brand names stamped on their boobs or bonnets like cars do and have, how do we know then, which car/person, who has the same innards as we so desire?

the only way, after about 6 seconds of pondering - is to "Test drive" them,

but you never know too, because again, unlike cars, a broken part is always broken, whereelse in a human mind, a broken part can be hidden - *jeng jeng jeng*omnious music ques* until it is too late... quite often, people get stuck in the test-drive period because it just takes too much time and energy to decipher or find out, any parts that are broken or not in the fashion which you desire... boring....

and the only way to find out, after about 7 seconds of thought - is to ask them.

but god i wish how things are that easy.

if you want to "buy a car" (the 3 words in this post is now interchangeable with the words "get into a relationship with someone), that can hide its brokeness or specs, wouldnt it be easier if you can know, find out what make, model, lifespan, attention needed, maintainence/service is needed?

so if you want a girlfriend or boyfriend, or husband or wife, the latter 2 comes much later than the former, cant you just ask the same questions as you would have asked to the car-salesmen?

Questions like -

how long will this car last me? - (How long do you want this relationship to end?)

how much time do i need to spend servicing/maintaining the car so it runs on tip top condition? (How much time to i need to divert my undivided attention to my partner?)

How much money do i need to spend on the said maintainences? (How much money do i need to spend on my partner?)

How often does the car break down, how reliable are its electronics? (How fussy is my partner? how often does he/she throw tantrums?)

How careful do i need to be with the clutch and gear box? (How gentle should i be with my partner in bed or anywhere else?)

the questions and hence list goes on.

so, instead of spending hours days months or even years in "TEST DRIVING" someone, why not ask the car, straight off the bat, those questions.

But most important of all the said questions is...another question -

DO you want to buy the car? and suffer/enjoy the consequences?

In Melbourne...

2008-06-30T11:42:00.002+08:00

... crashing Choke/Ben/Steven's place, and its been awhile since i have met people like his house mates.

Them, living with a few chinese/hongkee people, kinda reminded me of the times when i stayed with a few mainland chinese back in 2006, or was it 2005.

First things first, they are not toilet trained, my dog Sabrina had better sense of where one can poop and where one cant. After they are done with their number twos and threes, the toilet bowl looked like as if it was recovering from a hangover, but not barfing and puking all over itself the night before. seriously, a 6year old kid would have made a less grotesque mess of himself/herself.

the floor around the toilet bowl sparkles with droplets of golden liquid, the white walls of the toilet bowl are lined with brown banners. How could they have missed by so much? i mean, i could piss with my eyes closed and i guarantee 100% of my discharge would land in the bowl. i guess i can put that in my resume because apparently, its a rare ability.

After taking a shower too, its like Katrina herself visited the bathroom floor. the water is so deep you could swim in it.

The jacuzzi tub. man, we all know it rinses of the dirt off your body when the streams and jets of water pound against your flesh. But, being courteous, i mean, its not YOUR tub right? so a sane person wouldve rinsed the walls clean.

But noooo, the tub is lined with dead skin fragments the size of jupiter. its disgusting, down right revolting, to see pieces of shit hanging off the white tub walls.

Next area of the house - The Kitchen

The kitchen is a sacred place, it's sanctity and holiness is highly regarded and sought after by people... like me!

but looking at the stove area, the sink, the "washed" cutlery and white goods, id rather dine in the aftermath of a medieval battlefield where walls of corpses are left to decompose.

and what makes thing worse is, they have the audacity to complain, to other house residents about Choke/Ben/Steven's mess, or their alleged mess they have made.

Its as if, they cut up some onions, some chili, some carrots, then washed and left the skin scraps in the sink, and merrily went their way, then come back for dinner (yes they cook every single meal and in between), and looked at all the onion, chili and carrot scraps and went "ewwwwwwW, look at the mess".

Cups stained with juices and milk and froth were left to collect moss and shrooms, who knows, maybe they could be harvested sometime later to be smoked or eaten. looking at the stuff they bin, im not surprised if they do.

anyway, this is just my brain diarhoeaing (cbf spelling), and if you think its disgusting of me to paint the walls of the internet brown of my shit, wait till you see their toilet AFTER its been used by these guys with crockscrew-shaped cocks and multi-crevice assholes.

------------------------
FLUSH
------------------------

P/S: just managed to see The Incredible Hulk - the one with Edward Norton and Liv Tyler. To sum up the whole show, its pretty bland, the plot progression is summarized right at the start of the movie during the preface.

The fight scenes reminded everyone (or at least those) who have seen Underworld, the one with the Lycan vs Vampire thing, what im trying to say is, its not original, its boring and not "incredible" at all.

HOWEVER (thankfully), snippets, or rather remnants of other shows which were not as unincredible made it into this film. The best thing was, they didnt leave it till AFTER the credits where we all had to sit and wait for the scrolling wall of text to go from the bottom of the page to the top of the screen.

I just hope that, with so much of this cross-textual and synergy of a few of these great films, the producers dont throw it all away in one mother-of-all lame movie where all the Marvel Heroes, namely Iron man (and now incredible hulk) in the Avenger Initiative, dont come together and fight some alien shit or Jedi's from galaxies far far away.

P/P/S: Hmmm, to my knowledge Batman was in the Justice League, but i also wished Tony Stark would appear at the end of the film to "recruit" Bruce Wayne. on that note, i hope the final Bang which Hollywood have done a good job putting the suspense and anticipation together would be about the differences between heroes aligned with Avenger Initiative/S.H.I.E.L.D and Justice League.

now THAT, would be Incredible to watch.

Part Fiction

2008-06-22T21:09:00.000+08:00

So I was driving out to get some chores done.

going along a familiar route, it brought about familiar sights and familiar grounds, then I heard this loud bang, and on the opposite lane, a car was coming at me on fire. The car exploded into flames in a split second, and it veered off its lane – crashing in my direction. I gently hit the brake pedal, to monitor the trajectory of the wreck, and in that split second, my judgment tells me it was best to stay stationary.

Not to my surprise i was correct in making that decision as the fireball rolled past in front of my car, missing me by about 3 meters. After the coast was clear, i went on my way because there were other cars present, and they would go to his aid. The bank was going to close anyway i better not miss the payment. So i drove off

In the bank, just when i had cleared my payment with the teller, someone yelled out at the front door, i glanced behind me just to see two masked men, armed with sawn off shotguns. It was a bank heist.
The guys said no one move or they will shoot, the crowd fell flat on the ground. I felt inclined to do so, but when i looked at the tip of both guns, i can see a slight flare in diameter, and the black colour was not consistent with the rest of the barrel.

“fake” I said to myself, so i just walked past them out the front door. They yelled insults at me and pointed their fake guns at me ordering me to stay put, i looked at them and went ‘lol’ try again with real guns next time.

One of them, feeling exposed, lunged at me. I crouched a little to put pressure into my knees so i could dive out at the last second, and i did. He fell towards the metal railing behind me, hitting his head hard. While Struggling to maintain his balance i aimed his “shotgun” at me, i just turned and walked away. The other guy ran to help his mate out. The security guards, now realizing the guns were fake, were on them in a split second, and quickly overpowered them.

I got on my car, started the engine, then noticed my fire extinguisher on my passenger seat.while holding it in my hands, I thought to myself, ‘this thing keeps rolling around when i take corners, pretty annoying”, and thought of a place to tuck it in.

It was then my car door suddenly swung open, and another guy held a knife to me.
“get out” he said. He was trying to hijack my car.

I turned off the engine, took the keys in one hand, holding the extinguisher in the other, i said “look mate, all i have to do, is squeeze this trigger here, and its going to let out a huge stream of white powder. The cops on the other side of the street are sure to pay notice and they will come. The keys are with me, and you wont be able to go anywhere except run... so, id advise you, to hijack someone else’s car okay?” he looked behind, and saw that there were indeed police on the other side, finding truth in what i just said, he said “you watch out you fuck!”
Slammed my door and ran off with the knife under is jacket.

What a day

I reached home finally, and went to take a shower. After that i did my late night grooming, shaving and etc. But as i looked into the mirror

OH MY GOD! IS THAT A PIMPLE?! OH SHIT!!! WHAT DO I NOW?! HOLY HELL MOTHER OF GOD! SHIT!1 HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GO OUT NOW?! "dont panic dont panic"

Taking a few deep breaths, “ok ok calm down” i said to myself, my mind racing for a solution. It was then I spotted ANOTHER pimple under the 1st one.
OH MY GODDDDD! NOOOOOO!

/panic

Sex in The Morning

2008-06-19T08:10:00.004+08:00

I Could soooo imagine this happening.

*Dawn Breaks*

Girlfriend (GF): mmmmhmmmmmmm *cuddles up*

Me: Morning baby.

GF: Morning *smile*huddles even closer*

*kiss*

GF: Got work to do today Hun?

Me: ergh, yeah *stretch*yawn*

GF: want a quickie to get your day started? *seductive smile*runs slender fingers down my chest*

Me: hmmmhmmmmm *subtle smile + slight moan*

Me: oh shit, what time is it?

GF: 9:45?

Me ah crap, can it wait Baby? gotta head to mackers.

GF: what?!

Me: yeah, gotta get some hashbrowns. *jumps out of bed*gets dressed* i'll be right back...

Gf: @:(

------------------------------------------------------

Studying late night, i got my 4am hunger pangs.. since i ran out of Indomee, and its long overdue to run down to the shops to stock them up, i have nothing warm to eat at this hour, except for half frozen/heated pies and cold sandwiches from the day before at the 24 hour petrol stations.

i thought to myself, okay, ill wait till McD opens, get some drive thru McD Breakkie :D best idea all day.

so the time came, 9am - I drove out. On the way theres nothing on my mind other than those crisp tender golden brown hash

i was speeding even, well alittle bit. If im lucky i get puled over by cops who are passionate about hashbrowns too, or i wont get pulled over at all coz the cruisers are busy drive-thruing for hashbrowns as well, which was the case,.

i pull up to the black magic box where you yell out what you want, and you will get it a few meters down the small strip of road.

I yell out the magic words:

"8 hashbrowns please*

the black box buzzes bacl *Sorry please come again?*

realizing it was kinda weird, i rephrased what i just said

"errmm, 2 hot cakes and 4 hashbrowns" so it would loook like im ordering for two.

but reaching down my wallet, i dont have any money left :( all i have is an Eftpos card. feeling comforted i got into 1st- gear. then noticed a sticker at the side of the magic black box

"EFTPOST NOT AVAILABLE SORRY"

=grr you better damn well be sorry!

i said to the black box, not so magical afterall

"errm, is your eftpost working at the moment?"
it buzzed back
"sorry sir, its not working at the moment"
"i dont have any cash on me atm, is it okay if i go punch some cash out and come back?"
"you can walk in upstairs, they take eftpos up there."
"ahh suweeet"

so i park my car, and while i was reverse parking, a cop car passes by right infront of me. i lol'ed a little inside.

I went in, walked towards the counter, where theres this cute cashier looking at me, broadest smile ive seen all week,

"what can i get you today"

"2 hotcakes and 4 hashbrowns please"

another girl, this one even cuter blarred out

"TWO HOTCAKES AND FOUR HASHBROWNS?" with a smile that looks like this ---> :D

i swear to god, this girl was even more passionate about hashbrowns than i am judging from that :D look.

then she immediately handed me a doggy bag, a huge one

"THERE YOU ARE!"

amazed and amused, i said "wow..." and smile back to the enthusiastic cashier girl.

grabbed my pack, and left.

On the way in earlier and on my way out now, it just happened that people were walking in and out, and always 2 steps ahead of me, so they had been bestowed upon, the courtesy to hold the door open as they enter/leave because i was right behind them. and both different persons, did.

feeling like a king, i drove home with a grin.

The smell of hashbrowns filled my car deck, and i grinned alittle harder....

:D

Best Praises You Can Ever Receive

2008-06-18T18:41:00.003+08:00

This is long overdue, but better late than never.

-IF- Simon Cowell said you can sing- You can Sing

-IF- Lewis Hamilton Said You can Drive- You can Drive

-IF- Gordon Ramsay said you can cook- You can Cook

-IF- Quentin Tarantino said you can Act- You can Act

-IF- Michael Jackson said you can Dance - Dont believe him if you're under 12, if youre not - You can Dance

-IF- Aj Rochester said youre fat- you are fat.

-IF- Socrates said you are clever - You are clever

-IF- Muhammed Ali said you can Fight - You can fight

-IF- Pablo Picasso said you can paint - you can paint

-IF- Jessica Alba said youre pretty - youre pretty

-IF- Ian Thorpe said you can Swim - you can Swim

But, the most important of all...

-IF- your parents said youre a good child...

... you better be damn well proud of yourself.

Happy Father's Day, Happy Mother's Day. Love you guys.

Encrypted Decipherment

2008-06-16T15:42:00.000+08:00

Rest to the Dawn,
Wake to the Sunset.
Befriend the Faun,
Breathe through the Corset.

Discount the Scale,
Weight placed onto Air.
Kismet to Fail,
Till Gabriel’s Horn Blare.

Obsidian Feather,
Next to Chronos’ Skull.
Knowledge here Hither;
To make Scriptures Null.

Deafening Silence,
Breathe in the –Moron;
Silence Deafening,
Shrill Truth –Forgone.

Inverse Reality,
Make Verse the Chorus,
Preached Eloquence,
Adverse Consequence.

Lingered Long have the Deadened Wight wait;
For the Law cast by Judgement Night’s fate.

Very Short Black

2008-06-15T13:37:00.003+08:00

Substance abuse ftloss.

Lately i my fridge ran out of milk, so i cant make cappucinos or lattes; the freezer ran out of vanilla icecream, so no affogatos, so im limited to short and long black coffee. But to make a long Black, that would mean i have to boil a different kettle of water to make a short black - long. which takes too much time and energy, so i've been drinking naught but Short Blacks.

now the thing about short blacks, since theyre potent little buggers, they taste really bitter if you take it without sugar. This morning (ahem morning being the time i woke up), i made a short black, as usual, then i ran into a dilemma - 2 sugars? or just one?

To oust myself, i decided to go with three, "I solved my own trouble created by my own troublesome, indecisive mind! Ha!"

Feeling smug, i just dumped sugar into a tiny-tinily small cup (alittle larger than an old-school camera film bottle), then my machine made that familiar pressurizing sound, and steam started to hiss from the vents.

Bam! short black in my hand. After stirring it alittle, i took my 1st sip of sin of the day, to my great surprise, it was bitter as hell, still it was good Brazilian Coffee.

nearing the end of the cup, id imagine the sugar to be all undesolved, and id have 1 last shot of sugary heaveness... i waited for it, but....

it didnt come... it was bitter thruought the whole small cup. Looking at the sugar deposits at the bottom of the cup, i pout. :(

no care, gotta get that sweetness. before i realize it, i was trying to lick the bottom of the cup, doing a myriad of stupid facial expressions unbeknownst to mankind.

:d :d :d :d :p

...too deep :( no sugary feeling :(

Bah...i'll just go grab a spoon.

Morning Serenade

2008-06-02T09:12:00.001+08:00

Without a cloud in the sky, the morning sun reigned supreme. Casting a halo through my bed post, i can imagine it did so for everyone else. Little ferns that crept out of crevices on my garden wall swing and sway to the serenity of the morning light. Seagulls too rejoice under its magnificence.

Gentle winds that power sailboats on the ocean bay drift up to my house. Gentle as they were, I tuck my wool blanket tighter around me; and instantly found home again.
The Sun with its mild lights danced on my cheeks and the orchestra of the surrounding flora, the warmth of being under covers – I was truly contented...

.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
...ItWasThenThatMyFuckerNeighbourBroughtOutALeafBlowerAndWent

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNG EENNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGNNNNNNNNNN ENNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNRRRRRRRRRRRRRNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEENNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEENNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNG NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEENGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGNE~~~~~~NNNNNEEEEEEEEEEEEEGNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNEEEEEEEE EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEENNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNEEEEEEEEEEE NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEGNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN GNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEENNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG ENNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEENNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRNGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG EEEEEEEEEEENNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN

...huarghthefuark

Just Another Day...

2008-05-31T21:52:00.002+08:00

“Two Caesar Salads and a Greek lamb kebab”, were the first words Mark heard that day; not that he pays attention to anything else anyway. Aside from interrupting the song Vivace from Brahms Orchestra, playing in his head, it didn’t bother him at all.

Pushing his black fringe back on his head, then tucking them in place with his toga, Mark throws the knob on the stove to medium, then heads to the fridge to gather other cold ingredients for the orders he has just received.

Just as he had put all the things he needed on the counter, Jeff walks in. Mark looks up, and Jeff quickly tilts his head to one side, indicating to Mark to drop whatever he is doing and get out of the kitchen, which Mark obediently follows.

It is not uncommon for Mark to receive orders like that, especially from Jeff. He doesn’t mind it at all- having to leave his work undone, not that the patrons at the restaurant would dare to complain anyway, in fact, most of the dishes Mark made never made it to the table because the patrons had already left. That of course was not due to the extreme long wait, but due to the fact the restaurant wasn’t really a friendly, peaceful place to have your lunch anyway.

Mark sits on steps leading to the back alley, reaches into his apron for his cigarettes. Just as he lit one up, Jeff started screaming something at another person who retaliated with his own yells. Mark being himself, didn’t pay attention to the contents, all he knew was those two men were disagreeing about something.

The kitchen soon sounded like it was being trashed. Metal clangs made from falling steel Tupperware, knives and cutlery falling off the counters – sounds all too common for Mark. The only thing that disturbed him was the fact he had to clean the floors again, and possibly pick up some human entrails while he was at it. He looked at the smoke emanating from the cigarette, took a puff and thought the cigarette was justified. He then looked at the tip of the joint, and somehow knew that the life of the person who was getting beat up by Jeff, would not last longer than those embers.

He took another long drag, hopefully the cigarette will burn out quicker, and somehow to him, that might quicken Jeff’s beating and end the poor sod’s life faster as well. For some odd reason, Beethoven’s 3rd symphony, like a travelling circus, pitched a tent in his mind.

True enough to his theory, the fighting did cease before Mark’s cigarette went out. The kitchen was quiet again. Jeff walked out of the kitchen to the alley where Mark was sitting.

“Sorry bout the mess mate... you got a spare cigg?”

Without saying a thing, Mark again reached into his apron pockets and handed Jeff a soft pack of Marlboros.

Jeff lit one up as well. "Cheers buddy", his words muffled his inability to open his lips fully because they were busy clenching the cigarette between them.

After getting the pack back, Mark, as obediently as he walked out- went back into the kitchen. The kitchen, aside from the displaced wares and a body who appeared to have drowned in his own blood - was the same as before. He then had a dilemma; should he clean up the mess Jeff has made first? Or prepare the two salads and kebab. Since the chicken needed to be pan fried, he thought he could do both at the same time.

The metal heat-rings on the stove were charred with something unidentifiable, and were releasing this weird smell. Mark glancing over his shoulder only to see a few black stripes on the body’s face, still hissing with smoke, solved the mystery of the once-unidentified chars.

As the pan started to heat up, the olive oil in it started to crackle. Fillets of chicken breasts soon joined in and danced in the golden-blonde puddle.

While the fillets were getting acquainted with the oil; Mark took out a mop and started pushing the pool of blood down the pipes.

In his mind, there were no thoughts –none other than the humming of Poco Allegretto.

Virgin Tears

2008-05-27T17:44:00.002+08:00

...tears of the year fell today.

Another Rave About EVE

2008-05-24T12:07:00.002+08:00

I know I know, I've been talking about EVE nonstop, and some of you might have already heard my ramblings of this recent interesting encounter in the universe of EVE.

But, here goes...

So, EVE is an open ended mmorpg, where the players themselves create and write the story of the game by playing it and "making" events happening. One of the most recent "universe worthy" news (they have news bulletins and "E-New Papers" in the game) was the loss of a Titan-class ship belonging to one of the greater Corporations of the game. Abit like real-life i might say, where a flagship of a certain country gets sunked by opposing forces..

But, there are things that happen in a much smaller scale, which also seem to resonate with the themes in real-life. I very recently had such an "encounter". To put things into perspective, I shall begin, at the beginning.

There is a universal channel in EVE, called Rookie Help, which acts as a newbs instant forum. Newbs in the game can post their questions and queries in the channel, and whoever knows the answer to those questions could reply them in-game on the spot. pretty handy, but since there are so many new players, the channel has to be monitored, and the users will have to abide by rules set by the game masters.

one of the rules of using that channel- it has to be in English. non-english speaking players could join their respective channels, all coded by a language.

So this guy comes on, and started speaking Russian, shortly after, he was directed to the Russian channel, intrigued by this, i wondered how many languages the game does support? so i poked around and learned that there are over 40 languages and each having their own channels. Being able to speak and write Chinese/mandarin, i hopped into the Chinese channel, and to my surprise, everything is in Chinese!! even the MOTD (message of the day) was in chinese.. it said "welcome bla bla - discussions on tribes, races, government issues and topics are dissallowed in this channel", "typical" i thought to myself.

eager to join the Comrades, i quickly poked around my Vista OS to look for the language pack, so i can type in chinese.

All of a sudden, this guy comes on and says "Hey, can anyone help me translate American into Chinese? I need to tell my chinese corp member something".

No one replied, being "affluent" in both languages i volunteered.

I was invited to a channel, and had to run through several procedures with the Corp guys so i can tell the chinese guy what to do. all the while translating from english to chinese, so the dude could understand what was required of him.

Soon, i learned that, the Corporation was sort of a "gangsta" corp. what they do is, recruit chinese isk (game currency) farmers to their corp. Since corps can tax their employees of their income (then some would be returned as "paychecks") the corp could benefit alot by having lots of chinese farmers in the corp (who presumably do nothing other than get isk-which is sold for real money in return),If youve played an MMO, you should know exaclty what im talking about.

So, the chinese guy was "recruited" into the corp, he didnt speak any english.

The guys at that corp then wanted me to find out more about the guy they just recruited. the most important info of all was "does he have any friends?"

surprised but not surprised at the same time, the guy said he has around 50 friends, working in the same RL-company as him, as ISK farmers. These guys mine in-game money to be sold as RL-RMB -as a living. 24/7, their job is to get in game isk.

The corp wanted me to negotiate with them, asking them all to join the corp, in return the corp would provide military protection against rogue pirates, who quite often prey on the poorly-pvp equiped ships of these farmers. other benefits of being in the corp includes getting a reduced - docking fee when docking at a space station, in low security sectors. The corp would also provide them with "ratting" space (killing NPC pirates with bounty on their ships placed by the ingame police- the CONCORD). these spaces are controlled territories, and are relatively free from rogue pirates. (the guns from the POS-plyer controlled stations, will rape ships entering their space without a starbase security code, which of course, corp members/alliance would have access to)

If the income of the corp was good (supplied by the employees/farmers), munitions, repairs and even entire ships will be given as compensation, if they were to be lost in their line of isk farming duty.

In the end, I managed to sway the chinese guy, to join the corp, and bring in a few of his friends, just to see how the corp treats them, and did they hold true to their word, and if the conditions are right, all 50 and more people will join the corp.

This is a huge advantage to the corp, having people like that under their control. the income-tax gathered by the corp would be enourmous.

the chinese guy thanked me greatly, for securing a protection-deal with the company, and the company too, was grateful for my negotiation/translating services. they were so glad i got them possibly a multi-billion isk deal, putting their recruitment/contracting requirements aside (being a large corp with controlled space, they only hire well-established players) they wanted to recruit me on the spot because of my supposedly-rare ability to speak a few languagees and dialects. they also promised me a large paycheck.

thinking to myself, if i were to join the corp as a full-time translator, id be talking most the time, not shooting. that would be abit boring imo :P so i kindly refused, but offered my services as a free-lance translator.

for my "troubles", the corp awarded me with a gratituie gift- of 22million isk. which was o.O alot for a newb player like me.

all in all, it was great fun.

Janitor

2008-05-19T14:53:00.002+08:00

Welcome Scipio, The which toked Hanyball.
Welcome Arture, the very Britain Kyng.
Welcome Defence to England as a Walle.
Cadwaladers Blodde lynyally descending,
Longe hath bee towlde of such a Prince comyng.
Wherfor Frendes, if that i shal not lye,
This same is the Fulfiller of the Profecye.
(Leland 1770: IV, 196)

The End of Remorse and Regret

2008-05-10T23:04:00.002+08:00

Streaks of light were able to enter the office, only through the horizontal slips in the metal blinds. Its journey through the room first met Franks left shoulder, then the apparition-like smoke, curtailing away from the ambers of his cigarette, mixed with those coming out of the barrel of nine millimetre Glock, which Frank had just fired.

Gesturing at the hapless corpse on the floor with the gun before setting it down on the mahogany desk, “Are you going to just sit there like him the whole day?”, torrents of smoke pouring out from his nose and mouth, “or do you want me to give you a push like the one I just gave him?”.

Blood was starting to seep and spread on the wooden floor in a circle, originating from the hole of the faced down corpse. Like a wildfire in the middle of a draught ravaged field - it seemed as if it was going to stain the whole floor maroon before running out of texture to paint on; like wildfire in the middle of a draught ravaged field- it seemed unstoppable.

The man across the table from Frank gulped, one could almost hear a whirring noise made by his brain turning, desperately seeking for an answer for Frank’s question, or Frank will be shooting more than just queries in the next few seconds.

After what seemed to be the longest two seconds of his life, he asked, “can I have a cigarette?”. With his index and middle finger Frank reached into his coat pocket, eyes still firmly set on his unrehearsed, suddenly-made hostage, pulled out a soft pack half filled with Marlboros, and lightly flicked it on the other edge of the table.

The man reached for it, while slightly tilting his head towards the floor to have another look at his not-so-fortunate counterpart. Like a wildfire in the middle of a draught ravaged field -The red was still advancing; like a wildfire in the middle of a draught ravaged field- it started from a spark; a spark no bigger than the muzzle flash of the Glock.

Taking two deep puffs as if it were the last two, “look, I’m really sorry we did it wrong, if only there is a way we can repay you...”

“Who is ‘we’?” Frank interrupted, pointing at the corpse under the desk using the two fingers he clenched his cigarette in, “if you’re referring to Roy over there, I don’t think, ‘we’ would be able to repay me...”

Making a case for himself “Well I’ll do it then!” exclaimed the man, still trying to avoid Roy’s fate.

“You and what army?”

“I had Roy before you capped him”, A pathetic attempt to instil the element of fault onto Frank, “now...now I’ll just have to make do with it, you’ve got to trust me! I can do it”

Frank, raising one eyebrow, “Like the last time I’ve trusted you when you said, I could trust you?”

“It will be different this time! I promise!” Begging for Frank’s trust.

Leaning back on his chair, Frank gave an empty stare at the desk for a moment, then said “Alright. Go.”

The man, Very surprised, could not believe what he just heard. He jolted when he tried to leave his chair but stopped for a second just to make sure, in that next second he established that it was safe to leave. “Thank you Frank, thank you, you wont regret this.” He got up and then bolted for the door.

As he placed his hand on the knob, instead of feeling the cold metal on his palms, he felt it in his back. The room had flashed at exactly the same time he felt this weird sensation. He was halfway collapsing to the floor before he realized what had just happened- Frank had shot him in the back. He fell knee first, then tried to look at Frank- he fell sideways to the floor as he did. The room was a blur, although one of the strips of light coming into the room through the slips in the blind landed on eye, it did not hurt, he didn’t squint to its intensity, but half-welcomed it.
Frank becomes a silhouette sitting on the chair, the square desk starts to lose its square edges and Roy’s corpse, suddenly bears his face instead.

He could feel everything around him, its only his vision that is fading out, he could smell the gunpowder, he could feel the ground he was lying on, and he remembered the cigarette Frank had given him- still between his fingers, still alit. But as his blood started to paint a second red circle, it touched the lit part of the joint, snuffing out the amber with an insignificant sizzle, just like a lone twig in the path of a wildfire, in the middle of a draught ravaged field...

Quote of the Month

2008-04-28T19:03:00.000+08:00

It takes an Outsider to show you, Who is on the Inside.

Polar Bears

2008-04-13T03:07:00.002+08:00

When the sky itself, splits into two; where do we mere mortals stand? Or when the ground shatters; which fragment should we lay our feet upon?

To stay still, is to fall into the chasm which had just began to exist moments ago.

If there was something we could do, to stop this armageddon, what would it be?

If only we knew...

Conversations of the Universe

2008-04-08T08:21:00.002+08:00

1: Oh look! Theres gold fish in there
2: Where? I dont see any fish
1: there right there! *points at a tiny black silhouette which quite often pokes the water surface from below*
2: you call THAT a GOLD fish? its not even gold in colour!
1: well, it does look like a gold fish, only its not gold in colour
2: its a Coal Fish then...

One Step Ahead

2008-04-07T19:22:00.002+08:00

I was a boy before, who could not wait to be a man,
Always striving to be grown, to be old, to be bold,
As stubborn as the winter cold;
As restless as the hourglass sand.

But as the leaves whitter and the end draws nigh,
What I’ve discovered with age is mundane ,
The things to be finished; life itself- inane ,
I am a man now, who could not wait to die.

The Sweetest, Bitterest Thing

2008-03-23T02:47:00.000+09:00

Under the console people danced en masse, to the beat of the bass and to the swirl of the lights. The crystal ball casts the room with golden and silver glitters, and on the people’s faces, it looked like galaxies carrying millions of stars.but one star stood out.
There she stood, there she danced. With the grace of a thousand waterfalls and the force of even more.
To my ears, the room fell silent. And all i could hear was her movements, in the twilight.
It scared me, when hundreds of people vanish into the night air, loud music faded into the background.
There she stood, there she danced.
Her visage, her face, i’d betray my entire race just for another look, just for another listen.
Her eyes so powerful, even light cannot escape. Hence i cannot tell you the colour.
White blouse and ivory heels, she was made of all things exotic.
I lay defeated- there is a God, for only a million beings with a million wisdom could possibly envision her visage, and then create it.
There I stood, there I wondered.

A Toast to Failure

2008-03-15T14:36:00.002+09:00

Heres to "You never know what you've got until you've lost it" - "You never know you've said 'You never know what you've got until you've lost it' until you've said it".

Amen to Bachelorship

Movie Marathon

2008-01-06T21:36:00.000+09:00

Recently, I've managed to catch Aliens Versus Predator 2, National Treasure: The Book of Secrets, The Golden Compass and the Bee Movie...

I've had this impulse to blog just about any of these movies but procrastination has got the better of me...

but since now that i am here, ill just say abit about each...

Aliens Versus Predator, well, to be very honest one cant say they are "dissappointed" by the over-drawn suspense and poor script/screen writting, mainly because, since this movie was not HYPED in any way or form, you cant seriously say you were "expecting" a blockbuster - this show came and went like a door to door salesmen who is very pessimistic about his persuasion skills. if it wasnt for that tiny banner tucked in the corner of a cinema i went to when i watched Hitman, i wouldnt even had known this movie was coming up soon.

but still, it was cool to see aliens getting lazered by humanoid-type predators. being an AVP fan myself, theres no other way this movie couldve played out.

On its own its a good flick, but when compared to other shows, its pretty shit house.

Verdict - 5.5/10

National Treasure-
Ive watched the 1st one and was thoroughly entertained. mainly because i had some knowledge of the crusader legends, and knights and stuff, overall it was good.

However, in this 2nd installment the villian proved to be quite inept as compared to the previous one where he had some historical knowledge. This new villian was helpless and only used force as his primary means of coercion.

i think its fair to say that the Book of secrets is dead on par with the 1st installment of National Treasure. eventhough i did not rate the 1st one in the blog, id say it scored a 6/10. the Book of Secrets, being as enjoyable as the 1st one, is a 6/10 in my record as well.

The Golden Compass- the thing about trilogies or non-standalone movies is that, they are never complete on its own. and since only the 1st of the trio has been released, It, is not complete, because it cant be. that being said, its extremely difficult to objectively assess the flick.

but something hit me in that show. Its as if everything that has happened in that show is actually based on something in the world we know and live in. Everything, i mean EVERYTHING is just like our reality, all the movie did was gave it some smoke behind a mirror which obscured its identicalness to our world, gave things a more fancy name (not in all case tho, the "Dust" in the film can effectively be replaced by the word "God" and it would still make sense, which was lame).

Too elborate names like that flying witch leader lady's which despite being specifically mentioned a couple of times in a movie, eluded my memory completely. and other jump-the-gun scenes like that part where the main character, the little girl managed to coax the polar bear king into fighting Ian Mckellan and then was named Something Slivertongue...i couldnt help but relate that to the part where the guy in Chronicles of Narnia was instantly dubbed "Sir Wolf's Bane" and i bet my left testicle anyone, EVERYONE would agree with me that, that, was lame beyond measure.

and of course, to all movie screen writters - Having a child indept in acting play your main is ABSOLUTELY NOT AN EXCUSE for your poorly developed character.

Overall Rating : Pretty Shithouse, but not the worst show you will watch. 6/10. but for the overhype- 5/10.

Bee Movie- If you can accept the fact that Bees can talk to Humans, its a good show. before watching this movie, you have to go in, and accept everything that is being shown here as being :Logical:. if you can do that, this movie is 8/10. if not, 4/10.

This evening, I managed to watch I Am Legend.

err I'll try to make this post spoiler free, so if you havent watched it, read with care. I might suddenly slip something in without realizing that i did. and since i dont double check my stuff, its quite common that i have slips and mistakes.

The start of this show was just epic. Since nothing much was given to us viewers in the ads and teasers, we were left to explore and find answers for ourselves (Or it can be said its being revealed to us in the movie) in the movie.

the suspense that came from this alone was monumental, legendary even. instead of jumping right into the fray, we were allowed into the world of the character Will Smith played. and to be very honest, it was very entertaining. dountingly so i might add.

the way the story unfolds in new, and unprecendented. which was neccesary for the plot to unfold without being too boring. glimpse of the past were slowly revealed to us throughout the movie. this was simply screen writting magic. these glimpses came both during the exciting parts as the icing of the cake and also during the down-lows so the adrenaline junkies dont fall asleep in that 2 minutes of silence. truly epic. just epic.

the aforementioned way of telling this tale was good because not only it filled in the blank spots effectively, it also eliminated most of the drudging parts of these "one man show" movies. like Cast Away by Tom Hanks, that was a total Disaster. the writters and director of I Am Legend was carefun not to fall into the same castaway trap. job well done.

however, like most movies of this genre, featuring this type of villians *ahem* \, they usually end in a horrible manner. usually VERY abrupt like nukes falling from the sky, or the main character dies... OR the villians slowly go away... like a blister on your feet.

i guess you cant blame the writters for this... the only way and i mean ONLY way a playwright could avoid endings like this is to not write anything from this genre at all.

if you could forgive the inevitable bad ending, 9/10.

if you cant... 6/10.

oh and P/S: Will Smith LOVES to product place in his shows. or is always opted in movies where theres product-placement is in abundance, like Converse-Vintage in I-Robot which was horrifically lame, I Am Legend was no exception.

throughout the show, several brand names were repeated a number of times. Brands like Ford, SPAM, Honda, Sony, Bob Marley, Shrek the Movie, especially Ford were mentioned in the film.

BUT, this time, it wasnt JUST these brands- Brands of the conglomerate, they actually snuck in something rather clever. so Clever, it takes a very cynical pair of eyes to detect. *ahem*wink*hmph23*

Clark Kent is going to Gotham City, OR Bruce Wane is meeting Louise Lane in Metropolis in 2009. can you guess it yet?

thats right, there is going to be a Batman vs Superman movie in 2009.

oh boy cant wait.

Ben Lomond -Part 2

2007-12-17T22:33:00.000+09:00

the location in the 3rd picture is called "Jacob's Ladder". reminded me alot of Pass De'Stelvio or however you spell it, on the northern tip of Italy. Except this wasnt made of tar, it was pure gravel and dust. taking the corners at a slow 15kmph still yielded some wheelspins and some planning. going at it at 30kmph would result in a tumble down the hill...

the 4th picture, was taken at the top of the mesa. this plateu stretches for a very long distance. during winter months, its entirely coated in thick snow, and the whole area is turned into a skii village. if you can zoom into the center of the picture, you could probably see the skii resort, which was closed the time i got there. despite the warm weather there at that time i was there, there were still pockets of snow between the huge rocks and crevices.

Ben Lomond -Part 1

2007-12-16T21:38:00.000+09:00

The "Spirit" of Tasmania and everything else

2007-12-11T07:57:00.000+09:00

So its that time of year again.

Christmas, for you very very, ill-informed people. Spirits are high, everyone is dandy and happy yay. But being in Australia during this iconinc season is .... ironic. 1st of all, despite growing up in a country located smack center of the tropical belt, i have come to think that Christmas, is daed synnonymous with snow. just like the words "serial killer" and "Dhamer". or, "Gin" and "Tonic" and "ice".

you cant really have one, without the other. no really, you cant.

imagine chugging down a glass of pure gin. not that bad yeah? but imagine, chugging down the same glass of pure gin, except this time, its been microwaved so its hot as hell.

thats how Christmas in Australia is like. Tho it bothers me alot, which is eccentric in itself because i had never spent a Christmas in a snowy place before and yet im complaining. It doesnt seem to bother the locals here tho. They celebrate Christmas much like any other country that celebrates Christmas-

Christmas trees lined with cotton to simulate snow... Christmas lights weaved into the aforementioned cotton... Toys.. Presents... people wearing Santa suits and the silly red cap (its a miracle they dont die of heatstrokes *Christmas Miracle*) all of this under a hot scorching sun.

so yeah. they seem to enjoy it just like anyone else would, except for a few... which brings me to this:

So i was onboard the Spirit of Tasmania II, on a cruise to Melbourne from Tasmania to meet up with my family and friends.

the boat is awesome, the last time i was on a cruiseship, i was only wee little, and thus cant remember much. i remember rolling around in the green carpetted floor, playing "catch" with the other kids as wee as me... and thats about it.

so this time was a good opportunity for me to re-explore the wonders of being stuck on a huge piece of floating metal.

onboard, there were cafes, a restaurant, many, many alcohol bars, pokies machines, 2 computers for asians to log onto QQ (1 dolla fo 4 minits btw), lounges with flatscreen TVs which air the latest episode of Surivor, even a Theaterette, showing Rush Hour 3.
(
Seems like fun if you have a group of the right friends travelling with you, or a girlfriend, which at the time i had none with me.

Being unable to enjoy the facilities completely, i only limited myself to my seat E26. sounds like a good number, but its a crappy seat- not window nor isle.

Reading a little sci-fi Novel "Life, The Universe and Everything" by Douglas Adam who also wrote "Hitch-hike's guide to the Galaxy", i was content.

but the need for sleep soon overcomed me and i slumped into my "ocean-view recliner" like a corpse.

before i did that however, i had the common-sense to wrap the strap on my bag around my arm, and also around the reading lamp fixed on my seat, just incase...you know...

i dreamt. of a few things. one of which was not a dream however- in the midst of my deep sleep,

A man came and sat next to me, said that the seat next to me was his, so he sat down, and i had to withdraw my arm which my bag was attached to, from there before he could. he also said "theres a space under the chair where you can put your bags..."

so i did as told as well. and, after that, it was nothing but blackness.

i woke up to a tinge of orange on my face, the sun was rising, and its rays are cutting through the infinite vastness of the ocean and onto the ship's starboard side.

earlier i had planned to wake up to the sunrise, have a coffee on the sundeck, basking in the golden rays coupled with the chilling breeze on my cheeks but at the same time hugging my coffee mug. but id like to see well while doing that, so i reached into my bag and dug out my contact lenses...

something was amiss however, the wethers original's i had in a bag have all spilled out in the insides of my sling bag... the envelope containing my plane ticket back was missing.

"have i left it in my car? hmmmm"

oh well, i'll check when i get back to my car. Then i remembered i had a coin sack, filled with spare changes just incase a parking meter in Melbourne was going to Rob me of. but alas to the meter, someone had beaten it to it.

i was robbed, without me knowing.

/sigh

ah shit, here we go again. its the end of year and i am here again, WITHOUT my FRIGGIN plane ticket.

so i did what anyone would do after they get burgled - i went and took a manly piss.

before i got to that tho, a man followed me into the loo, and asked me..

"did you lose something?"

"oh hell yes" i replied, trying to muffle my anger and sadness with an enthusiastic sigh.

this samaritan told me, he saw someone sitting next to me, and going thru a bag. he assumed it was his own.

"ahhhh".

so we both went to the security counter, and gave my details etcetc. the security guard took out a notepad and wrote down the things ive lost with the utmost precision and clarity.

i did my part as well, giving him descriptions of the things ive lost.

-a clear sandwich bag full of spare Australian coins, roughly about 8-10dollars.
-my plane ticket, which has my name stamped on it, and is bound for KL.
-a Casio branded camera, Exlim model. I even told him what pictures were in the camera.

the guard, after hearing the descriptions of the burglar given by the samaritan, said "i think i know who youre talking about."

apparently a few other people have already lodged this incident. a few other people were hit and they all gave the same description.

the guard told us to wait at the counter, and called us to the office soon after.

he came out with something in his hand.

a clear sandwich bag... In it, were alot of Australian coins, a few pieces of paper which later turned out to be my ticket, a silken bag which held my camera and a single, foreign note. It was 50,000 Indonesian Rupiahs, in a single clean note.

"he mustve thought he had hit the jackpot this fellow here".

i lol'ed

then the guard continued,

"we found all this in his knapsack. and when we asked him 'are you going to Malaysia?', the culprit paused a while, tilted his head back abit with both eyes slightly stretched open and said '....yeah'".

i lol'ed again.

this has gotta be the worst thief in history. the only reason he had gotten so far was because he was robbing the worst passangers in history.. im ashamed to admit im one of them.

but really, to pull of something like this, the most important thing the thief has to consider is an exit strategy. and the only, i mean ONLY exit strategy you can get when youre pulling a job on a boat, is swimming out.

unless you have another pontoon or vessel that could carry you out before your victims realize what they are missing or before the ship docks.

OR, if you can yell to your partner in crime "GET TO DA CHOPPA" after you pull off a job, youre basically screwed.

but if you had a boat large enough and that could survive the turbulence stirred by a cruise liner in its wake or a CHOPPA, why would you need to resort to small handbag thievery?

the biggest mistake he has made, is that he kept the clear plastic sandwich bag. i ended up with more coins than before. he mustve kept the loose ones he found on other people in that same bag of mine. I even told the security that i cant guarantee that all of the coins are mine, but the sec-Q said it was okay.

oh well...

back to the theme of words that are synnonymous. The SPIRIT of Tasmania, and THEFT.
that didnt quite work out no?

--------
as i gratefully collected my things, the guard asked me-

"do you want to press charges?"

immediately the heaps of paper work came to mind, and my mind shut downed from there on.

"ugh, no..."

the guard didnt encourage me in anyway other than nodding. then scribbled something on his notepad again.

besides,
its Christmas, its a time of forgiveness.

Info:
Spirit of Tasmania Cruise,
8pm-7am daily cruise, both ways from Melb/Tasmania
prices vary from 80aud to 500Aud (depending what you like)
Fun for chillout groups
if you ever order steak, tell the waiter/waitress to put the sauce at the side.

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Side story "Conversations of the Universe"
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As i was waiting in the counter for the management to return my stuff that was stolen, a drunk woman i have noticed the evening before was at that same counter.

she wasin her late 30s, had her head shaved clean with punk stud earings, said to the counter girl in a very coarse, almost manly voice:

"i want to speak to someone"
"can i help you miss?"
"yesterday i was as pissed as 10 men, and i didnt know we cant bring alcohol to the decks, your people approached me and took my drinks"
"yes miss"
"well, i want my money back, i paid for the two drinks you guys took away!"
"im sorry miss, we cant help you here"
"i want my fuckin money back"

i saw her yesterday, she sat a few rows ahead of me... people who had put down reservations for the restaurant downstairs were called in by the intercom once their turn was up.

everytime the intercom buzzed, she would bark at it, trying to be witty, replying to messages like

"paging parties Smith, Donna and Roy to the Seasons Restaurant please"

with

"WHAT ABOUT PARTIES PISS DRUNK !#$!^%#@^& AND $#%$&#*&#$?!"
(if you dont understand, its okay, because its unintelligible to start with)

poor woman, shes either really really financially poor to have lost possibly two cans of beer and made such a big fuss about it, or just plain obtuse.

What Jesus Forgot to Tell You

2007-11-09T00:31:00.000+09:00

I was born a Buddhist, hence the karma cycle has been embedded deeply in me.

for those of you who dont know what it is, Karma, essentially means "what you get out is what you put in".

so for example, you punch someone in the face, that person punches you in the face. but thats too direct and simple -to first understand how karma works, you have to believe that it exists and operates in a way more sophisticated than God. maybe Karma IS god in a sense. but the punching example i gave earlier is way too simple.

a more accurate example would be something like this.

person A cheats on B by sleeping with his wife C. person D killed person E's daughter- F. so B, E and F are victims in this little scenario. in that same life time or the next, or the one after, person G comes along, and steals person A's life savings when he needed it most, and he suffered greatly as a result. his wife left him for another man, who in the end happens to be G, and G had left his wife to a miserable suicidal death, who was C in her previous life.

Person A got so upset and was pushed up the wall he had to resort to criminal stuff and robbed D, which in this life time was a rich and successfull person, which in the rustle hustle with troubled A, was killed by A's gun. E and F, later reborn as siblings help each other mature and grow in a good family and led a succesfull and fruitful life. since they were brought up so properly in that life, they did charity. but in their journey to help troubled people like G (in another life) complications arose and G could not get any help, and was miserable and sufferred a great deal of hardship.

okay...

its hard to understand Karma, but knowing that what you put in comes right back at you makes you check yourself every once awhile. so that you stay behind that yellow line.

its like a big maths equation, or algebra. if you add "1" on the left side of the equation, you will have to add "1" on the right as well. if you move your multiply to the other side, it becomes divide. everything is calculated and taken into account, word for word, number for number.

Christians i know, reject this theory. They take the saviour, merciful approach. that one day, the human sins will be washed away clean, when the messiah returns. those worthy will go to heaven, and those not will not.

isnt that? an example of the karma system working? why are some worthy and some not? i wont have to explain that.

Jesus, tho he is truly great, i think he forgot to tell his diciples that karma actually works. assuming he is god, he can do many things, but there is one he cannot do - alter karma. if he could he wouldve just washed them away and he wouldnt have to die.

the reason why he had to die was because tho he cannot destroy karma, he could move it. and thats what i believed he did, by moving all the people's karma to himself, he is the ultimate sinner and had recieved an inhumane punishment thus.

bleh...just my random babble. its late, ill go to bed : /

A Novel Experience

2007-11-03T22:30:00.000+09:00

Dear Blog,

Today, i had a novel experience.

I was going home after spending an evening with Leese, and on the way back, it was pitch black. there were no street lamps whatsoever. the only source of illumination i had, were the stars from billions of light years away (that didnt help much), bedroomlights from the neighbouring suburb (nope, no help either) and my cars headlamps (which were alright but they only shone in one direction - dead front).

the highway was tar black, blanketted by a thin film of rain water. I drove peticularly slow this evening, because i had a bad experience with my rear tyres just a few hours before, and that - has saved me awhole lot of trouble, and more importantly, possibily saved another persons life....

what happened was, i was approaching a suburb exit, which had a lane of its own, converging with Brooker Highway within 200-300 meters. Brooker highway itself had 2 lanes, i kept to the left one because i was going significantly slower than the speed limit (100kmph).

then all of a sudden,

a black silhoutte appeared dead center of the converging highways. if it wasnt for the contrast casted on the figure by the white markers on the floor, i would have, ran into it. ending its life, well possibly, or seriously injured.

i quickly flicked my steering wheel to the left, and managed to avoid hitting it.

after my vehicle had come to a halt, i immediately recalled upon what i saw, that split second where my cars lights had illuminated the figure. i saw a fairly short person sticking his thumb out, shoulder and hips were about the same broadness, had long blonde hair and had a handbag.

a girl.

whilst doing all that i had turned on my hazard lights because i was stopped at the side of the highway.

she ran over, and opened my door, her hand clasping a cellphone, pressed against her ears, an a handag clasped between her armpits.

right there and then questions raced thru my mind, am i doing the right thing? is she a blackwidow spider? she going to kill me after finnishing her damsel in distress routine? or, shes just a poor woman who got stranded out in the wet highway, bracing the full force of the wind and cold.

i really hoped it was the latter, as i was too deep to pull out now.

i gave her a lift to the city, since she said she didnt want to interfere with my own route. she was headed to Kingston, which is a looong way more... i offered to send her all the way back, once, and not twice because that would seem weird no? the good samaritan who appears to be too good. she might think shes the one who might be in peril.

i asked her what she was doing all alone on the streets, she said her expartner was seeing another girl, and that that other girl is at his place. she couldnt take it, so she left.

well, id really like to say "what e prick", but for obvious reasons i didnt.

so it went on without incident, i dropped her off in the city, where she would have to walk another good 2 hours or so to get into Kingston. i felt really bad, but yet if i did anything more it would be weird and awkward.

im really glad my phone wasnt knicked off me, or anything valuable in that sense, like the last time i genuinely helped someone. fuckingchinese...

but i would be really glad if she is able to hitchhike with someone honest who is indeed going to Kingston... but at night, at a time like this, i regret to have to say her chances are slim...

so, the next best thing is to hope for is it doesnt effin rain...

Joke?

2007-10-29T20:58:00.000+09:00

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A: Say, i dont know what happened but theres a pimple on my scrotum sac. it hurts like hell.

B: dude, are you sure?

A: yeah it looks like a pimple to me

B: dude. its technically and physically impossible for a pimple to grow on your scrotum sac.

A: oh...fuck....
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P/S: purely fictatious

The First Tear Drops

2007-10-25T11:55:00.001+08:00

The flat surface of an empty wooden table was more fascinating than what was going through your mind. you scratch the smooth surface with your fingernails. the duo sung a morbid tune. funnily, it was soothing to your flaring ears. the feeling of your hair being tugged by your hand too, was surprisingly comforting. the pain from thousands of strands of hair peeling away from your skull, somehow liberates pressure from your mind. you wonder how much more do you have to pull before the matter from your mind leaves your skull by oozing out through the infinitely small pores created by what once held the thousand black stalks, people called "hair" in place.

you cry.

the tears were bitter yet sweet. it was a novel feeling since you could not remember how it felt like, let alone taste like. you lash out your tongue, and lick the drop that fell nearest to your lips. it tasted devilishly divine, so pleasant and at the same time, so destructive it had almost made you smile...

...but it didnt. maybe you needed another sample. once again you lick the next tear that rolled down your cheeks. this one, different from the first - had no taste. you ponder for a split second to why is that so, but your thoughts could not reach a conclusive conclusion. despairing the fact you were unable to feel again, that novel feeling, that novel taste, to be able to decipher what caused that pleasure and at the same time what had caused your pain - you cried more.

the tears that followed were the same as the last; tasteless and miserable.
seeing that there was no longer any joy in tearing, you stop. and yearn for new sensations.
time passed. so much infact, you forgot how crying felt once more. you fork out your tongue and thristily lash at the first tear drop, and there it was again.
the feeling was like a flash surge, overwhelming you completely and then left as quickly as it
came.

once again, you are left there, on that desk, fingers still on the table only now it's surface is raked by you. the few strands of hair litter the place. you give them a quick hush and they all scurried away from you;like a colony of startled rats, and fell of the table.

once again, you sat alone, fingers still on the table...
...waiting for the next, first, teardrop to fall...

Don Quixote

2007-10-24T12:24:00.000+08:00

I want to be a meow cat meow
One that could purr and growl
could I be a Tabby? orange and cuddly?
Or an Ocelot that huntsalot.

I shall jump from roof to tree
and tree to thee.
I shall perch on curtain rails;
or a ceiling fan if that fails.

I shall bask under the sun
Or on hay stacks in a barn
I shall sleep like I am free
and go where my dreams bring me

I am Don Quixote reborn
His vision intact and untorn
I fence the villians I meet
and save the Maiden from the Keep

I slay the monsters in my traverse
even when the odds are adverse
Then I wake from my victorious nap
on my loving associate's lap

I stretch and let out a fiersome yawn
as I meet Dusk's Dawn
I then rub at my keeper's feet
to tell them its my time to feed.

It is luxury to live such a worryless life,
but yet experience adverture and strife.
It would truly be a Heaven Sent,
to live the life of my Feline Friend.

An Alternative Narration of the Ten Plagues of Egypt

2007-10-14T11:17:00.001+08:00

Recently I got to see a film called “The Reaping”. First of all Id like to say that this movie is good. I wont spill the plot at all but it involved the Ten Plagues which most of us are familiar with. If you had watched the show “The Prince of Egypt” by Disney I think (The one Malaysia banned right off the bat because it had religious connotations and the government was afraid it would affect the fragile balance of our religious beliefs) *roll eyes*. You should have a fair idea on what the Ten Plagues and Ten Commandments are.

Other older shows like “The Ten Commandments” had also put the Ten Plagues of Egypt as their cornerstone and highlight of the show.

So anyway, The DVD I rented featured a scientific documentary that explained in a scientific (and I mean archeological, sociological and historical) light.

The Ten Plagues happened circa 1500B.C. one of the biggest, or arguably THE BIGGEST natural phenomenon that had also happened around that time was the eruption of a massive volcano located in the Mediterranean region. This eruption, or more like explosion was so huge, it had swept volcanic ash all the way to Egypt, some thousands of miles away.

So began the Ten Plagues.

The First plague (I apologize I cant remember the order of the plagues)
The Bloodied River.

It was believed that Moses had turned the entire Nile River, red of blood, as a defiant act against the Pharaoh. First of all, no one would know if the river was indeed filled with blood because they lacked the scientific equipment or knowledge (arguably) to test if the blood was indeed blood. So modern day scientists worked on that uncertainty.

It is widely known today, that Algae is the source of sustenance for aquatic life since they are at the bottom of the food chain. Different levels of acidity in the water, affects the way algae behaves. And since algae is the lowest in the Nile River’s food chain, it affects everything above.

The volcanic eruption might have caused the PH levels of the Nile to change dramatically. This is evident because the soot samples drilled from the river bed was compared to the volcano in the Mediterranean that had erupted during that time, and they were identical.

This change in PH levels had caused the algae to bloom in an explosive manner, stretching for miles and miles both upstream and downstream. And no surprise there, the colour of blooming algae – is Blood Red.

The change of PH levels triggered a cascade of events. The blooming algae then produced toxins due to its biological functions in the massive loads. These toxins were released in such high amounts and at a rapid rate- the ecosystem in the river was affected so severely most of the animals died.

And the animal that mattered most – was fish.

The sudden decimation of thousands of fish had allowed what was at the bottom of the food chain bloom. In this case – Frogs.

The Second Plague
The Rain of Frogs

One single frog can lay eggs up to the hundreds. They have such a high production rate because most of the tadpoles gets eaten by fish. Since the fishes are no longer allowed, we can assume the frogs reproduced at a success rate of 100%.

Assuming:
One frog = 100 eggs
100 frogs = 10,000 eggs

And so forth.

So the Nile River suddenly exploded with frogs. So much, it would definitely seem like it had rained frogs the night before once they had reached a mature age. No doubt with such a dense population of frogs, the whole lot will die of starvation and inter-species competition.

Thousands upon thousands of frogs then beached up the shores of Egypt, and died.

The Third Plague
The Plague of Gnats

First of all the word “Gnat” was loosely translated as Live of Fleas.

With hygiene levels dropping like dominos lined in unison due to the animal carcasses from the river, the human body now deprived of cleanliness becomes a hotbed for parasites like lice and fleas.

The Fourth Plague
The Plague of Flies

The thousands of frog corpses don’t fly to heaven. Flies eat them, and lay their eggs in these thousands of frog carcasses. Again, we have the frog equation.

No frogs, millions of flies.

These flies then reproduced and reproduced at a rate it would seem unnatural. A Plague so it would seem. Its not hard to imagine the scale of it all.

The Fifth Plague
Diseased Lifestock

The flies that had hatched from the frog corpses were vast in numbers. Now the remaining question is – What type of flies?

It was held that Stable Flies (the ones that hang around stables hence the name) were the common species of flies in Egypt at the time. Being such a successful civilization, a city like Egypt is bound to have massive amounts of livestock.

What is so special about stable flies you might ask, stable flies are special because they bite…

…and their bites are not pleasant. It leaves an open wound and the wound then puts the victim in a series of dangers. The most prominent one is infection.

Remember the water from the Nile has been so contaminated of corpses of fish and frogs now that it is toxic to both humans and beast. Livestock, cows in particular drink up to 12 gallons of water per day. And in a water-ravaged land such as Egypt, the main source of water would be the Nile River.

It is no surprise they get Diseased and then die off shortly after.

The Sixth Plague
Boils

Keeping in mind hygiene levels are at an all time low, now affected with lice, its no better being a human than a cow in 1500BC Egypt. Now dehydrated, starving and dirty, ancient Egyptians were open as targets for disease and illness. The Boils could be caused by scratching of the skin due to dehydration and the lice infestation. (1st and 3rd plague)

It could be infected wounds caused by the stable flies from the 4th plague, and who knows what diseases all the cow carcasses (5th plague) had exposed their ex-human captors to.

It could be caused by either of the plagues that had preceded this 6th plague; it could be all of them.

The Seventh Plague
Storm

We return to the volcanic eruption. Thousands of tones of dust were shot up into the air during the eruption and had by now inched their way to Egypt. The dusts acts as a medium of sorts (forgot what the term was) that had enabled water droplets to form rapidly and quickly. These super-formed rain then fell as ice. Or hail.

With the sudden change in air density and moisture, lightning rolled down the skies at what seemed to be in supernatural proportions.

Hail, wind and rolling lightning. It is not an uncommon sight in places constantly ravaged by storms like this. Southern USA had seen the better of phenomenon’s such as these.

One must understand the history of Egypt when being revealed this demystification. Egypt is a dry place with very infrequent rains and thunder. All of a sudden, they are exposed to weather like this due to a volcano (Don’t think any Egyptians of the time knew what a volcano was either, I bet if they had saw one erupt, it would be in the Bible or any other writings as god’s work too).

So all these events were seen by the ancient Egyptians as the Seventh Plague – Hail of Ice and Fire.

The Eight Plague
Locusts

The 7th plague had now passed. All the hail have melted into the ground and the land was now drenched in water. Locusts from the surrounding deserts of Africa are attracted to moist ground because they lay their eggs 4 inches in the soil, and the soil has to be moist enough for their egg laying devices to penetrate.

The land was now made rich by the previous storm and locusts, swarm to greet this fertility.

And this event is then know as the 8th plague.

The Ninth Plague
Darkness

Now there are 3 possible events that had occurred in that time that would’ve caused this “plague”.

One, and this may be a little far fetched, but the locusts that had migrated into Egypt was so vast in numbers they blocked out the sun.

Two, there had been a sun eclipse

Three, now this is the most plausible one-
, the volcanic ash had now finally reached Egypt descended upon them. other volcanic events that had happened in other places such as the Philippines and Indonesia had that similar result – Darkness.

Pure darkness - Eyewitness accounts say that they can’t see their fingers out stretched before them due to all the dust and ash. It had literally blocked out the sun.

The Tenth Plague
Death of the Firstborn

To be able to answer this myth, one must appreciate the sociological norms of ancient Egypt. In the land of the pharaohs, the firstborn is very special – they are the heirs to the throne so they say. Their wellbeing and health is paramount in almost all Egyptian households, it is this very reason that the firstborn were the target victims of this plague. The Israelites might have a different norm than the Egyptians, therefore it would appear as if they had been “spared” of this wrath.

With all the 9 previous plagues in effect, or had came to pass, the wheat, grain and livestock were all destroyed. What the Egyptians had left were food stored in previous months. Food that were capable of being stored includes grain and perhaps preserved meat.

The storm had perhaps caused the moisture in the air to rise to such levels it had breached whatever containers that had been used to store grain. Mould had probably contaminated the grain, rendering it poisonous to the person who ingested it.

The same goes for preserved meat. Meat that was previously sun-dried had now retained some moisture, allowing flies and the likes to lay eggs inside them.

The ones that had eaten these contaminated food grew ill extremely quickly, added the fact they were already starving, dehydrated and unhygienic to begin with.

And being perhaps the “most-important” member of the family, the firstborn, ate the most.

So it seemed that all the ten plagues can be addressed using science and that the victims are not as specific as what Moses had depicted.

Again we look to the sociological norms and psyche of the Hebrews of the time.

There were no, qualifying or quantitative terms at the time. everything, was absolute.
Words like “All”, “everything”, “everyone”, “the land” “the people” are just a few examples used in Biblical writings. The word “All” was repeated over 50 times in each of the pages describing the ten plagues.

This raises some skepticism even in the least cynic minded of readers.

Say for example, if All the Egyptian livestock were killed, and ALL the Israelite’s one spared, what would have happened?

The Egyptians would have either raided the Israelite’s stables and butchered their livestock for themselves, OR

The entire Egyptian population would have been wiped out. Assuming the locusts had also eaten ALL the wheat and grain.

Imagine starving a million population city. Kill all the McDonalds and Burger King and Wendys in Manhattan Island alone for 2 days and I bet you my faith ALL HELL WILL BREAK LOOSE.

What about the splitting of the Red Sea? Some of you may ask. In the documentary It was explained as well

Moses and his gang, might not have crossed the Red Sea. Because walking across the span of hundreds of miles is ridiculous. Do you know what will happen to the ecosystem of an ocean if you split it in half for half a day?

They might have mistaken the Red Sea, for Reed Sea. Its another sub-submerged piece of swampland, and at low tide is possible for humans to wade across. And wamptland would wreck havoc on the Pharaoh’s chariot if he had opted to pursue Moses and his people. again another “miracle”.

Other writings such as Noah’s Ark also have scientific and archeological explanations. The events really did happen, as in the flood and the boat, just not at the scale of which it was portrayed.

But I shall leave that for another post. Im taking too much time writing this already.

Anyway, believe what you please, I was just shown an alternative side to the story and would like to share with you this little piece of info.