The Greatest Outlaw in Australia...
...well, not really...
so after 4 freaking hours of lectures, I got a call from Johnny saying he needs groceries, so i went up to Mt Nelson to pick him and Louis up and off to woolies we went... a couple of other errands around Sandy Bay and were off back to home...
I bought myself some chinese take away that smelled heavenly (or maybe because i was famished at that time) and i really wanted to chow down A.S.A.P, like "Right now muthafucker A.S.A.P"not the "i think i can hold out abit longer A.S.A.P".
so there i was travelling along Sandy Bay towards home and i noticed a couple of cars going really slowly, literally hogging the road... at that point my belly said "smoke the muthafuckers"; my brain said, "yeah do it... butdo it in a legal manner tho", so i sped up to 60kmph
then it was right there and then a blackleather suit dude jumped onto the middle of the road and pointed at me this black thing that resembled a toy gun... not a glock 17 or a barretta toy gun, it was huge and looked like something Invader Zim from Mars would use.
i was like "muthafucking bogan!"
but this blackleather suit guy, was no bogan...
....he was a copper...
BAM! busted for speeding.
my legal instincts kicked in like a straight up in the nose cocaine shot.
"defense defense defense", my mind chanted.
alas, theres not many things you can defend yourself against a speeding ticket...
but i thought id try anyway...
Trick #1: the mistake defense
1st of all, in order for this defense to work, it has to be a mistake of fact, not law. so saying i mustve mistaken the speed limit for this area (which is usually 60 but was 40 during school hours) is a no go... because 40kmph is law, not a matter of fact.
HOWEVER, because of the varying speed limits for the different times, time now becomes a fact. 230-400pm is 40, and some hours in the morning, the rest of the day its 60.
"i usually dont come home around this hour officer...therefore i drove at 60" said I.
he said "you must keep your eyes up and pay attention to the signs and when the speed limit operates"
BAM! defense failed. my mistake of fact could easily be "un-mistaked" if i looked at the road signs.
what else couldve worked?
Trick #2: Neccessity
I was so fuckn hungry i need to eat RIGHT NOW (at home) that if i dont i'll die of gastrict attacks....
errr.... 1st of all, neccessity isnt a defense for criminal conduct, nor is it in ordinary statute law; its in torts. and because no damage was done, this defense has half-failed.
Trick #3: Automatism
all the crown has to prove to convict someone of speeding is at the time of the incursion, the driver is willingly driving, or voluntarily driving the motor vehicle. (motor vehicle is defined in the definitions section of the code).
the only way to bypass it, is to prove that at the time the driver was caught speeding, he was driving involuntarily... so the onus switches from the crown to the driver..
you could say that, you are insane... and you dont know that your driving... but thats the defense of insanity... and its rarely used... its usually used by people who are so desperate theyd rather to go an asylum rather than a jailhouse should they play this insane card..
Automatism, is abit like Insanity, but its different in a sense that its a temporary state, induced by a physical, external element.
so a concussion from a football in a football game prior to driving that caused the driver certain ailements that made him speed, under the effects of medicinal drugs or getting stung by a bee at the time the speed limit was exceeded would normally acquit the offender from charges....
so... hmmm if i were to rely on that defense id need to establish
1. i wasnt dirivng voluntarily at the time i was caught
2. building onto point 1, the reason of it was because i was induced by some external element
a. element has to be physical.
b. element has to be external.
I wasnt stung by a bee....
Johnny didnt hit me at the time i sped...
i could say receving my scores from the faculty was quite daunting... but thats a mental element, not physical...
i've got nothing in this defense : /
so i went with Trick #1. but nonetheless it didnt work...
#!$%!*^%^&$!!!...
Readers Notice:
I have used vulgarities and name-calling in this post to "spice-up" my writting. I do not mean any disrespect whatsoever to the law nor the executive members of the government namely the respected Police Force of Australia.
so after 4 freaking hours of lectures, I got a call from Johnny saying he needs groceries, so i went up to Mt Nelson to pick him and Louis up and off to woolies we went... a couple of other errands around Sandy Bay and were off back to home...
I bought myself some chinese take away that smelled heavenly (or maybe because i was famished at that time) and i really wanted to chow down A.S.A.P, like "Right now muthafucker A.S.A.P"not the "i think i can hold out abit longer A.S.A.P".
so there i was travelling along Sandy Bay towards home and i noticed a couple of cars going really slowly, literally hogging the road... at that point my belly said "smoke the muthafuckers"; my brain said, "yeah do it... butdo it in a legal manner tho", so i sped up to 60kmph
then it was right there and then a blackleather suit dude jumped onto the middle of the road and pointed at me this black thing that resembled a toy gun... not a glock 17 or a barretta toy gun, it was huge and looked like something Invader Zim from Mars would use.
i was like "muthafucking bogan!"
but this blackleather suit guy, was no bogan...
....he was a copper...
BAM! busted for speeding.
my legal instincts kicked in like a straight up in the nose cocaine shot.
"defense defense defense", my mind chanted.
alas, theres not many things you can defend yourself against a speeding ticket...
but i thought id try anyway...
Trick #1: the mistake defense
1st of all, in order for this defense to work, it has to be a mistake of fact, not law. so saying i mustve mistaken the speed limit for this area (which is usually 60 but was 40 during school hours) is a no go... because 40kmph is law, not a matter of fact.
HOWEVER, because of the varying speed limits for the different times, time now becomes a fact. 230-400pm is 40, and some hours in the morning, the rest of the day its 60.
"i usually dont come home around this hour officer...therefore i drove at 60" said I.
he said "you must keep your eyes up and pay attention to the signs and when the speed limit operates"
BAM! defense failed. my mistake of fact could easily be "un-mistaked" if i looked at the road signs.
what else couldve worked?
Trick #2: Neccessity
I was so fuckn hungry i need to eat RIGHT NOW (at home) that if i dont i'll die of gastrict attacks....
errr.... 1st of all, neccessity isnt a defense for criminal conduct, nor is it in ordinary statute law; its in torts. and because no damage was done, this defense has half-failed.
Trick #3: Automatism
all the crown has to prove to convict someone of speeding is at the time of the incursion, the driver is willingly driving, or voluntarily driving the motor vehicle. (motor vehicle is defined in the definitions section of the code).
the only way to bypass it, is to prove that at the time the driver was caught speeding, he was driving involuntarily... so the onus switches from the crown to the driver..
you could say that, you are insane... and you dont know that your driving... but thats the defense of insanity... and its rarely used... its usually used by people who are so desperate theyd rather to go an asylum rather than a jailhouse should they play this insane card..
Automatism, is abit like Insanity, but its different in a sense that its a temporary state, induced by a physical, external element.
so a concussion from a football in a football game prior to driving that caused the driver certain ailements that made him speed, under the effects of medicinal drugs or getting stung by a bee at the time the speed limit was exceeded would normally acquit the offender from charges....
so... hmmm if i were to rely on that defense id need to establish
1. i wasnt dirivng voluntarily at the time i was caught
2. building onto point 1, the reason of it was because i was induced by some external element
a. element has to be physical.
b. element has to be external.
I wasnt stung by a bee....
Johnny didnt hit me at the time i sped...
i could say receving my scores from the faculty was quite daunting... but thats a mental element, not physical...
i've got nothing in this defense : /
so i went with Trick #1. but nonetheless it didnt work...
#!$%!*^%^&$!!!...
Readers Notice:
I have used vulgarities and name-calling in this post to "spice-up" my writting. I do not mean any disrespect whatsoever to the law nor the executive members of the government namely the respected Police Force of Australia.
posted by Killl_Roy at 1:44 PM
6 Comments:
wicked ...lol
milt
milton_foo@hotmail.com
True Story...
anyway, hello! have we met?
Lies. You hate the mata mata and you know it
P/s grats on finally getting your life back. Saw your post on Gorg forums.
Lol Moe,
Thanks :)
People should read this.
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