Conversations of The Universe
this is a collection of conversations ive overheard while doing the stuffs i do.
Aloysius, Rick, Jerry and I were walking down Swanston St when a group of beautiful ladies came walking up in our direction. as our distance closed, this is what we heard:
Lady 1: youre the fuck face
Lady 2: *at Lady 1* youre the fuck face
Lady 3: *points at Lady 2* no youre the fuck face
Lady 2: *points at Lady 3" haha youre the fuck face
Lady 1: *points at Lady 2 and 3* youre the fuck face
they go on until the moving tram across the street severed their voices from our ears.
shortly after that...
Rick: *at Jerry* youre the fuck face...
...
At the Union House..
unknown male: he was sooo pissed last night he started humping everyone's legs..
...
In a Que at woolsworth, Cahsier comes across some washing powder.
Cashier 1: *to me* shoppers card?
Roy (me): nah
Cashier 1: *to Cashier 2* you wanna hear something bizzare?
Cashier 2: go ahead
Cashier 1: my friend's place got broken into last saturday, and the theives stole 2 tubs of washing powder.
Cashier 2: uh huh
Cashier 1: i mean, dont you think its weird? break into a house and steal 2 tubs of washing powder?
Cashier 2: maybe the had too little to carry
Cashier 1: yeah but still, washing powder~
Cashier 2: is that all they took?
Cashier 1: na mate, they took 2 mobile phones, a laptop, their TV, and dvd player...and 2 tubs of washing powder. is it just me? or i think thats really bizzare
Cashier 1: ...
Cashier 2: *to me* thats 27.50 thanks.
...
At Trevi - Lygon St
2 men in suits sat right next to our table. they were big in build, one out dresses the other.
Man 1: what happened to Jeff?
Man 2: (mumble)
Man 1: okay ill call him *dials handphone and presses it against his ear*, hello? John? what the fuck did i tell you? i told you to take good care of Jeff, hes a good man.
*brief silence*
Man 1: i want those lawyers off him. hes innocent. see what have you done now? hes a good man, i told you to fucking take good care of him.
*brief silence*
Man 1: the video tapes show theres nothing there, you and i both saw the video, theres fucking nothing on the screen. you call those lawyers off.
*brief silence*
Man 1: you say that ONE more time ill deal with you myself. i TOLD you to take good care of Jeff. thats something VERY easy and you didnt do it. if anything happens to Jeff ill fuck you up, you hear me?
*slams phone on table*
...
Aloysius, Rick, Jerry and I were walking down Swanston St when a group of beautiful ladies came walking up in our direction. as our distance closed, this is what we heard:
Lady 1: youre the fuck face
Lady 2: *at Lady 1* youre the fuck face
Lady 3: *points at Lady 2* no youre the fuck face
Lady 2: *points at Lady 3" haha youre the fuck face
Lady 1: *points at Lady 2 and 3* youre the fuck face
they go on until the moving tram across the street severed their voices from our ears.
shortly after that...
Rick: *at Jerry* youre the fuck face...
...
At the Union House..
unknown male: he was sooo pissed last night he started humping everyone's legs..
...
In a Que at woolsworth, Cahsier comes across some washing powder.
Cashier 1: *to me* shoppers card?
Roy (me): nah
Cashier 1: *to Cashier 2* you wanna hear something bizzare?
Cashier 2: go ahead
Cashier 1: my friend's place got broken into last saturday, and the theives stole 2 tubs of washing powder.
Cashier 2: uh huh
Cashier 1: i mean, dont you think its weird? break into a house and steal 2 tubs of washing powder?
Cashier 2: maybe the had too little to carry
Cashier 1: yeah but still, washing powder~
Cashier 2: is that all they took?
Cashier 1: na mate, they took 2 mobile phones, a laptop, their TV, and dvd player...and 2 tubs of washing powder. is it just me? or i think thats really bizzare
Cashier 1: ...
Cashier 2: *to me* thats 27.50 thanks.
...
At Trevi - Lygon St
2 men in suits sat right next to our table. they were big in build, one out dresses the other.
Man 1: what happened to Jeff?
Man 2: (mumble)
Man 1: okay ill call him *dials handphone and presses it against his ear*, hello? John? what the fuck did i tell you? i told you to take good care of Jeff, hes a good man.
*brief silence*
Man 1: i want those lawyers off him. hes innocent. see what have you done now? hes a good man, i told you to fucking take good care of him.
*brief silence*
Man 1: the video tapes show theres nothing there, you and i both saw the video, theres fucking nothing on the screen. you call those lawyers off.
*brief silence*
Man 1: you say that ONE more time ill deal with you myself. i TOLD you to take good care of Jeff. thats something VERY easy and you didnt do it. if anything happens to Jeff ill fuck you up, you hear me?
*slams phone on table*
...
posted by Killl_Roy at 11:11 AM
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