The Bang That Wasnt So Big

I looked into a piece of my past today. Looking at myself then at her, thinking if i were to bring her with me, where would she be? then i found it- A space within my withins. But it didnt seem right, the edges may fit the void, they do not however, match. She now follows another being. One entity so alien to me, i cannot comprehend his shape. He seemed to be carrying her by his side rather well. i am somewhat relieved.

It is both a sight that angers me and soothes me. Such emotions and feelings one cannot begin to imagine. but i can, for i have felt it first hand; for i have seen it with my own eyes.

Then there were memories of myself and my past and her past then herself, how we met and how we talked. they were sweet but sourness accompanied us wherever we went. There was chemistry between us that was happening but not happening. The gasses mixed and all we needed was just a spark. but it never came. the gasses dispersed and on numerous occations they formed again, but yet again they failed to ignite. perhaps it was not meant to be. it was not meant to be.

We have both took a path that neither of us could follow each other. so did many of my companions. more and more our paths are diverging, less and less people are by my side, and even less- converging paths.

i see her, my past, drifting away by my side. i did not attempt to reach out to her, i am not sure whether that is a piece of my past i want to carry into my future, or not. I gazed at her as her figure slowly blends in together with all the others. standing out less and less by the passing second, until i can no longer notice her out of the passing crowd. i could catch a faint smile at the side of her lips. that would suffice, a monument of what we once had together. i replied the smile with a smile of my own.

The gasses have dispersed once more, and i know...they will never be formed, ever again...