The socially informed will tell you, there are certain things you cant do on your 1st date with someone, such as, errr, attempting to kiss the person(maybe on the cheeks depending on local culture), talk about your ex partner as a conversation topic, telling him/her that you have a habit of sleeping stark-naked etc etc. But that’s for dates.
What about for people meeting for the 1st time?
if this is the case, and would like to know him/her better? Theres a wide belief that asking for someone’s number on the 1st meeting would signify the other party that you’re desperate to know them better, or just to have an extra set of numbers in your phone book should you need a booty call some lonely evening. Of course, that’s not “polite” or “socially acceptable” behaviour. Some will tell you “it hurts the long term process”, trying to “build castles in a day” scenario as they will inevitably collapse one day soon.
So, 1st meeting taboo – No Telephone Number requests.
BUT, obviously im not the 1st person in the world to address this issue. Somewhere, some place in this world, millions have talked about this already.
Some “genius” (note the inverted commas) have thought about this taboo. It is a taboo because, like aforementioned – asking for their number too soon means youre too desperate to wait for a finer day. So, this Desperate Genius, who also happens to be adept at computers and browser designs, thought of a way to override, or bypass this “taboo”. He/She thought day and night, desperately needing a way to satiate his/her desperate need for acquiring the Other’s number. The result of this endless brooding is the hell of a spawn – Facebook.
Nowadays, on a first meeting, people no longer ask “can I get your number”, they ask “do you have facebook?” (or friendster or myspace, cousins of the devil), because Facebook whoring, being a relatively new internet/Cultural phenomenon, even if it’s a “bad thing”, its not written down in Book of Taboos 101 yet. Perhaps maybe someday it will.
Now, weighing the advantages and disadvantages of using facebook as an opening contact line instead of the good old “can I have your number” – Lets see.
Facebook:
1. Counters the phone number taboo, hence proving “You Are Not Desperate”
2. some chicks dig it
3. shows that you have a computer…
4. …and know how to use SOME of its functions
5. once the other side sees your facebook account, the “number of friends” counter showing at 6million, will prima facie show them “you are actually rather popular” and have “many friends”
6. Facebook never runs out of credit like prepaid phones do
7. its “new school”
8. more importantly, people have the benefit and luxury of playing this meeting game within a shroud of anonymity. What I mean by this is, people dare to speak themselves out more openly in text/via the internet, than talking to a person face to face or, through the phone(Ball-less approach if you want my personal opinion, don’t get me a hypocrite; I’ll talk with you about this in person if you request for this )
and the list goes on.
However, given the “advantages” of using facebook instead of asking for a few digit number, it doesn’t change the fact that ITS STILL A short-turkey way of getting a contact!
Its easy, its hasn’t been “taboofied”, you get to remain a certain level of anonymity hence have the balls to talk balls… none of which one should be proud of, or take advantage of.
So, the true social moral here IS:
If you’re NOT desperate, and don’t want to appear so, DON’T ASK for contact details of ANY FORM, including Myface or Spacebook or any of the sort.
If you are NOT desperate BUT honestly sincerely want to know this someone better, ASK for a PHONE NUMBER or a SECOND DATE, because some browser program isn’t going to allow you to “KNOW someone better”
If you are DESPERATE, suck it up as ASK for a phone number because taking THE shortcut (Facebook) is the same as building a castle in a day (unless you’ve got an army of slaves that are all expert builders and engineers, metaphorically speaking)
I emplore you to ask yourselves the next time youre put in the situation stated above;
"Which is the Real Taboo?"
